


Clueless

by RedKitsune



Category: Actor RPF, British Actor RPF, Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF, Real Person Fiction, Tom Hiddleston - Fandom, Tom Hiddleston RPF
Genre: Actor Tom Hiddleston, Clueless OFC, Coffee Shops, F/M, Hiking trips, Love at First Sight, Self-Esteem Issues, She doesn't know who he is, Small Towns, Tom's beard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-07
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-08-20 07:24:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 24,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16551500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedKitsune/pseuds/RedKitsune
Summary: Sofya was a perfectly plain woman living a perfectly average life in small town Arizona. She went to work, came home and repeated the process the next day. She dated average men who found her to be too plain and always left. Nothing remarkable every happened to her. When a tall British man named Tom walked into her life- or perhaps it’s better to say when she walked into his, spilling coffee all over them both in the process- her lack of experience with anything beyond plain and average left her clueless as to what was coming. Could Sofya ever be something more than perfectly plain to someone?





	1. Coffee

**Author's Note:**

> Just some fluffy fun. I do hope it is liked.

Clueless: Coffee

 

Sofya was a plain woman who did plain things. She wore her plain brown hair in a pony tail and wore plain jeans and a plain button down shirt over her plain tank top. Plain gray boots graced her average feet. Nothing about her was remarkable. She worked an average job at a average bookstore. She lived a plain and average life in a simple small town.

She expected that eventually she would fall in love with someone equally plain and average and they would have a plain and average wedding, small but not too small with their plain and average family. She would eventually live the ever so plain American life. Maybe have some kids, trade the simple apartment over the real estate office in for a boxy mobile home in the park at the north edge of town and raise kids who would end up being just as average as she was.

The only thing unique about her was her name. It was a old Russian name that had often been passed around the family, meaning something along the lines of 'wise woman'. With a name like that, she should be smart and quick witted. She was not. That was just one more area where she was plain and average.

She got up for work in the mornings, left her plain apartment and got a perfectly mundane cup of coffee on the way to her average job. This was her plain and average life where little changed in it. The world around her changed and sometimes those things were exciting for some people. New buildings went up, old ones went down. New business came and some didn't stay long. Storms rolled in and rolled out. The sun came up and the sun came down.

It was perfectly plain, living in a small town. They were just a hour and a half from Phoenix and many often made the trip for entertainment. Sometimes visiting performers would stay in the small town, away from the city, seeking something perfectly plain and average for themselves. The townspeople worked hard to give them just that, a perfectly plain visit to a perfectly plain small town.

She never paid the celebrities any mind beyond sometimes overhearing the whispered names. It didn't matter, not really. Sofya had her books and her music and so it was rare she even would be able to put a face to a name. It made it easy for her to overlook the notoriety of some of her guests at work, when to her they were all just a part of her perfectly average day.

 

On this particular average winter day, Sofya was running late. A windstorm had knocked out the power to her apartment and her cellphone had run dead. In her purse it sat, connected to a battery back slowly regaining life. She was at least able to call her boss who insisted she still stop and get a coffee to go on her way in. While she was perfectly plain and average, she like most needed a cup of coffee before she was fit to deal with customers.

The line at the cafe was long. Between that and running late, she should have guessed that she wasn't in for a perfectly average day but unfortunately, she was clueless. When she reached the front of the line, she ordered her plain mocha and expected the rest of her day to be perfectly average. Nothing of note every happened to her, beyond occasionally running late for work. Maybe if she would have just acknowledged that this day wasn't a perfectly plain and average day, she wouldn't have been so shocked by the events that were to come when she sat and took them in, a few short weeks later.

 

Sofya turned and waved at the barista as she walked out of the cafe door. It was something she had done countless times before without anything happening. Today however, just as she began to turn forward again she collided with a mass of a person. The lid on her cup popped off and brown liquid sloshed and spilled down her arm, all over the jacket and shirt of the person she had walked into and onto her tan sweater dress. The heat from the burn caused her to drop the cup instantly, where it joined the man's cup on the ground.

“Shit! I'm so sorry!” She wiped at the spilled coffee on his shirt, clinging to his frame in a way that was hinting at what was underneath before realizing she was now essentially rubbing her hand on a stranger's wet abs and chest. A blush exploded across her face as she stepped back, hitting the door behind her and finally looking at the man who's clearly expensive suit she had just ruined.

“No, Darling. I must apologize, I was not looking where I was going. The bloody phone had me distracted.” Reaching out, he took her hand in his, examining it as it began to turn red from the hot coffee spilled on it. “Are you alright?”

“I'm...” Distracted. He was beautiful and his accent was like music in her ears. His long fingers pushed the sleeve of her dress up, finding where the redness ended while she dumbly kept her eyes on his face. Shaggy curly hair shifted with the wind and dark rimmed glasses added to his charm. When he looked up from her arm she could swear her perfectly plain heart skipped a beat at his bright blue eyes that were anything but average.

“Darling, let's get this under some cold water.” His hand was so warm as he softly wrapped around hers and before she could really think to protest, he was dragging her back into the cafe.

“Sof?” The barista called, startled to see her friend being pulled back into the shop behind a man.

“We've had a bit of a spill. Do you perhaps have somewhere we can wash up? I'd like to get some cool water on her burn too.” The man spoke up, still holding her hand in his. He was mindful to keep pressure off the reddened skin.

“Just around back.” The blonde barista pointed and Sofya found herself being pulled along behind the man again. He was tall and wore a dark blue suit that seemed to hug him, even where it wasn't plastered on with quickly cooling coffee.

“I'm alright.” Sofya managed to finally say as he opened the washroom door and pulled her in. The door clicked shut behind her as he turned open the tap.

“It's okay. I'm okay, really.” She protested as he shoved her sleeve up and put her arm under the water. She couldn't argue that it felt good on the heated flesh but really, his shirt was far more damaged than she was and he had to have been burned too. “Are you okay?”

“I'm truly very sorry about that spill, Miss?” He looked down at her with concern clear on his face, disregarding her question in favor of asking his own. His beard was neatly trimmed short giving him a warm fuzzy look that softened the sharpness of his high and pronounced cheekbones.

“Sofya.” Manners couldn't be ignored for long. “Really, it was my fault. Your shirt must be ruined?”

“Sofya? That's a beautiful name.” Her face felt warmer than her burned hand at that moment. “As for my shirt, no worse than your dress. I do believe we are at least even in that.”

He laughed and she was captivated. He had a fleeting chuckle that seemed to light up his entire being. It was mesmerizing and she couldn't look away. For how plain and average she was, he was everything she was not and could never hope to be. Just standing with him made her feel small.

Yet somehow, she was now alone with him in a bathroom. That thought hit her like a ton of bricks. They were alone. In a bathroom. And she didn't even know his name. If it felt like her face was burning before, it was clear on fire now as he took a wet wad of paper towels and dabbed at his shirt, only succeeding in making more of the fabric translucent and clingy before giving up.

“Where have my manners run off to? I'm Tom.” Tom took her hand in his and examined the redness as he spoke. “It's looking better already, thank goodness.”

When he smiled at her again, her brain short circuited. Surely she should say something. Words were a thing still used to convey meanings, right? If she tried hard enough, maybe she could even say one. Words became very hard. What were words again? She suddenly remembered coffee cup on the ground, next to hers outside.

“Let me at least replace your coffee?” Her little town didn't have anywhere she could replace his shirt but coffee? She could manage that much. He looked surprised before another wide smile graced his face, as if the thought was the best thing he had heard all day. She couldn't fathom why, she was just a painfully plain woman with a coffee stained tan sweater dress.

“Yeah, let's get coffee. I'm sure this is better than what the hotel had to offer anyway.”

Standing in line with him she felt the eyes on them. She couldn't really blame them, he was tall and imposing, yet seemed to radiate warmth. Even if he was cold as stone, she was sure all eyes would be on him, just because of how handsome he was alone. She wondered for a moment what he would look like clean shaven.

“You're a local?” He asked, when the silence drew on as the line slowly moved forward.

“Grew up here, yeah. Never really left.” She shrugged, feeling insecure under his gaze.

“It's a nice little town. I can see why people come visit.”

“You're from overseas?” She needed to change the subject or they would stand in silence again. Stating the obvious was the best she could come up with. She wasn't worth talking about, not worth spending the time on. She was just plain, average, forgettable.

“Ah, yes. I live in London. But I travel a lot for work.”

When she asked him what sort of work he did, he was caught off guard and all he could do was laugh. It was another whole body laugh and she watched as his tongue peeked out, pinched between his teeth. It was physically painful to look away when Sara, the barista asked for her order with a smile full of mirth on her face.

She quickly ordered and motioned for Tom to do so as well. His voice made even something as everyday as a coffee order sound nearly musical. It was a sin. It was magical. She couldn't look away as the Sara read off the total. Because of how distracted she was, she was slow in grabbing her wallet out of her purse.

Tom was faster than she was however and when she looked up he was far closer to her than she expected and was holding out a credit card, which Sara was quick to take.

“Wait, no let me-” Her protests were cut off.

“Too slow.” He countered as Sara swiped the card.

“Tom Hiddleston. I wonder, it's almost like I've heard that name before.” Sara was hardly containing her laughter as she watched confusion dance across her friend's face. “Sof, you better call me tonight!”

“Am I in trouble?”

“No, just clueless.” This was rich, the best entertainment Sara had in months and unlike Sof, she actually watched movies. This did out do the entertainment she got out of watching the latest Avengers movie, seeing the man himself in her little town. She handed the card and receipt slip back for him to sign as she set about making the drinks.

“What was that about?” Sofya asked as they stood aside.

“No clue.” Tom smiled as he collected the drinks.

“I could have gotten it. It's the least I could do for ruining your shirt.”

“Maybe I'd rather your company as repayment for the shirt? Regardless, your dress took some of the spill as well. We are even, both down a garment.” Tom waved away her concern. “Perhaps you can tell me how you fill your time? What is there to do around here? I've got a few days to fill.” His smile was so painfully warm.

“Mostly I just work.” She shrugged, sipping her mocha.

“What do you do for work.”

“Just at a bookstore. Nothing special.” Tom stopped in his tracks.

“Bookstores are always a special place. You're lucky to spend your days surrounded by the hopes and dreams of others.” Again he smiled that blinding smile. “What about when you're not working?”

It was odd how he kept the conversation on her. She was boring, plain, average. Surely he had more interesting things he could talk about. Surely he had better things to be doing than walking with her.

“Hiking, normally. When I'm not reading.”

“Would you believe it if I told you I've never been?” She laughed at him and he watched as her honey brown hair danced around her in the wind.

“I would. You scream City Boy. City Boys have better things to do, more interesting things normally.” It was so odd to him, the offhanded way she put the idea aside.

“Maybe,” For the first time he hesitated and she couldn't begin to understand why. “you could take me, Sofya?”

She looked like a gaping fish for a moment. Her jaw unhinged and clamped shut silently. No sound came out as she repeated the action a few times before managing to utter, “What?”

“Hiking? You, me, ideally together?” His smile was so warm, she couldn't refuse him and so she did the next sensible thing: she grabbed onto the first excuse not to.

“You can't go hiking in a suit.” And he laughed at her.

“I didn't mean right this second and I don't just wear suits. Maybe tomorrow?” The warmth of his hand startled on her back startled her and brought her back to reality.

“Yeah.” She nodded, feeling dumb. “Yeah, sure. Okay. Hiking. Tomorrow. Make sure you wear boots.”

“Wonderful. I'll meet you at the cafe, just name the time?”

“Half past nine, is that okay?”

“I'll be looking forward to it, Sofya.”

 

Sofya spent the rest of her day in a daze. Oddly enough, it progressed just as it normally would. She saw the same plain customers, had the same plain lunch and went home to her average apartment. Yet, she couldn't get her mind off Tom. He was everything she wasn't and she hardly knew him. Somehow his warm smile and bright eyes convinced her to go out on the trails alone with him. It was a stupid move, that was how painfully plain girls die first in horror movies.

Yet, she was excited just the same. The whole situation was so oddly abnormal that a part of her was sure she would wake up and find it had been a dream. Or, more than likely that she would make it to the cafe to only be stood up. Surely, someone so beautiful as him would realize she was just plain as could be.

With a sigh, she pulled out her phone and called Sara. She waited as it rang and ran before her friend answered.

“So, Tom?” Sara didn't even bother with a 'hi' or 'how are you'.

“Tom.” Sofya was lost at to the point of the conversation. “What about him?”

“You're seriously clueless?”

“I'm not sure what I'm missing.”

“What all happened with him?” Sara quickly changed tactic. Sofya didn't know who the attractive man was and he would be more than happy to enjoy this show for so long as it lasted as long as her friend didn't get hurt in the process.

Sofya told her friend about the hiking trip and their short shared walk. She was chastised for not getting his phone number. She was finally allowed to go to sleep with the promise of reporting on any and all events during the hiking trip.

 

Tom made a trip into Phoenix, as much as he didn't want to go into the city that evening. A wide smile was almost always on his face and he was in high spirits as the shop clerk set about assisting him in selecting boots that would give sure footing on any trail. He'd spend the next few hours wearing them to break them in and if he was lucky he could avoid sore feet and blisters.

With his good spirits, he was more than happy to humor any fan that crossed his path. It had been a good long while since he had so much energy and joy at these simple random encounters with his fans. While it was always good to see them, it was often draining. Now, he was more than happy to have a distraction, a way to pass the time and share his good mood.

When he made it back to his hotel that night, he was eager to sleep. Unloading his pockets on the table, he kicked off his shoes and set aside his jacket. He was looking forward seeing Sofya again and wondered how her day had gone.

With a glance at his phone he frowned. The woman had captivated him instantly. As much as he wanted to send a simple text message to Sofya to ask how her day was or maybe to check on her burns. Like a proper fool however, he had neglected to get her phone number.

Laying back on his bed, he closed his eyes and pictured her. Dear god was she a beauty and that was saying something. His life often put him around men and woman of high standards of beauty. Yet Sofya knocked the very breath from his lungs. There was a effortless beauty that just seemed to encompass her.

He could just picture the sun as it danced off her honey brown hair, just a few shades too dark to be called blonde. She had such a small nose, it was adorable with freckles sprinkled around the bridge and high on her creamy pale cheeks. When she first looked up at him from wiping at his shirt he had a sudden and powerful urge to lean down and kiss it. Chocolate brown eyes seemed to come alive with worry and concern for him all while ignoring what surely had to be a painful spill.

The nail in his coffin however was her voice. It was sweet and melodic in everything she said. He could be lost listening to her speak, watching as her pink lips moved to form each word.

Tom knew he had a problem. It happened time and time again. He would fall hard and fast against his better judgment. It was his curse and this time his heart set itself on a woman who clearly had absolutely no idea who he was. She looked at him and just saw a man and that, paired with her beauty and kindness made for a concoction that was deadly.

In the span of a few minutes, she had captured his heart, as if she had accidentally wiped it clear out of his chest while she was simply trying to wipe the coffee from his shirt. Tom was always hesitant to voice it, but he was a romantic at heart. So much so, he still held high onto the notion of love at first sight. Such naive ideas however often would scare away a woman.

Tom found he couldn't wait to see her again. Morning couldn't come soon enough for him. He dearly hoped she would come as agreed, that she wouldn't back out. She didn't know him from Adam and as much as he liked it, because of that she had no reason to trust him, none at all.

If her friend, Sara he believed her name was, told her who he was, would she still come? If she knew he wasn't just a everyday man, would she still treat him like one? Surely the attention on his life, the pressure would scare her away long before the simple logistical challenges would have a chance to. But by god, did he want to see her again.

 


	2. Preparations

     Tom was early, waiting in the cafe long before the appointed time. He checked his watch no less than ten times before settling down with a loaner book off one of the shelves. Try as he may, he couldn't focus on the words. His knee bounced and bounced, sometimes knocking into the table. His foot tapped at the ground. A shift in position may make him more comfortable and he could settle down and read, surely. Fingers tapped at the table. It was hopeless, he decided.

     Another glance at his watch showed he still had at least ten more minutes to wait. He'd already been sitting at the table for 45 minutes and time was dragging on ever so slowly. At least now it was close enough that he could order them coffee and it not be cold, giving away how early he had been.

     “Finally decide on some coffee, Loki?” Sara laughed as his long legs took him to the counter. She had gotten no end of amusement watching him fidget about all morning. “I think you managed to read all of two pages? Maybe three?”

     “Ah, yes well.” He scratched at his neck and looked away, guilty and embarrassed at having been so closely watched without him even noticing it.

     “So, what can I do ya for?” The choice of wording caught him off guard and Sara laughed again at him. It wasn't often she got to play with the famous people that came through town. Normally she wouldn't but this one seemed to take an interest in her friend, making him fair game.

     “A cafe late, to go.” It took him a few beats too long to answer. “And, oh what was it.” Her drink slipped his mind and he cursed himself. He wanted to have it ready and waiting for her.

     “Sof gets a mocha, every morning almost.”

     “Yes, one for her then. Thank you.” He moved out of the way of the counter as the blonde made his drinks, though the cafe was fairly empty.

     “So, hiking?” Sara asked over the sound of frothing milk.

     “What gave it away?”

     “The boots for starters. Also, Sof told me last night.” She handed over his drink, containing her delight just barely when her fingers skimmed his.

     “Ah. Are the two of you close?” At the first too hot sip his eyes closed for a moment, savoring the burn and smell. Few things were better than coffee.

     “Grew up together. Small town girls, we had to stick together. Most everyone left for school and a few of us came back, a few of us study online or make the drive. She stayed though, her Da was sick and when he passed, she just never left.”

     “Was it recent?” Tom didn't want to take advantage of a vulnerable heart.

     “He's been in the ground six years now.” Sara shrugged.

     “Why does she stay?” Tom knew he was prying but the woman had plagued his thoughts all night.

     “I don't know. But I think what you're really wanting to know is if she had someone who keeps her here. Someone of the male kind.” Sara eyed him as she handed him the Mocha.

     “I guess I am.” Tom admitted in defeat only to have Sara laugh at him again. For a man who wasn't trying to be funny, the blonde found him very amusing.

     “She doesn't. I've tried to set her up a few times but nothing sticks. She says she's too plain but really she just doesn't put herself out there. I think she's just scared.”

* * *

 

     Sofya stood in her kitchen nibbling at a banana. She didn't want it, not really but she needed to eat something. Two cups of coffee left her jittery and hopefully the food would balance out the nerves. Why she was so nervous, hell if she knew.

     Okay, that was a lie. She knew. It had everything to do with the British man who was surely six feet tall with a voice that could melt the ice caps. All night she was haunted by the memory of that voice, the warmth of his smile. It was killing her ever so slowly. She had never wanting anything so bad while feeling so unworthy at the same exact time.

     A man like that, he surely had women lining up for his attention. Add in that accent and being in the US, he could have anyone he wanted. She was sure he could just look at a woman and they would fall to his feet. It was pointless to even entertain the idea. Not when she was her.

     She was plain. Average. Unremarkable. Forgettable. She hadn't even bothered with dating in over a year. She had a long history of men cheating on her, replacing her to remind her just how plain she was. She just had to survive taking the man hiking, somehow. Still, she didn't know why he wanted her to take him. They had tour companies that did such things and provided snacks even.

     With a sigh, she grabbed a small backpack that would act as her purse for the day and shoved her wallet inside as well as two bottles of water. Surely the man would think to bring his own water but it was better to be safe than sorry. Deciding against packing food, she stepped out the door and locked it behind her. They could grab some sandwiches on the short walk out of town.

     Checking the time on her phone, she could see she had ten minutes to make it to the cafe. She was going to be right on time. Better to be on time to face your doom. The air had a slight chill to it, making her thankful for her light jacket. As soon as they started walking up the rocky paths and the sun got higher in the sky, she knew she would shed it.

     It was that time of year, after all. Where the night and mornings had a lingering chill that made her yearn for hot coffees, sweaters and boots but as soon as midday rolled around it was too hot. It was times like this where she thought about moving. Going somewhere far away, someplace that had more than two seasons (hot and hotter), someplace where maybe she could try and be more than she was. In the end, she never did leave because, where would she go? Where could she go? How would she know where to go to try and be more than plain and average? It was better to just stay in this small town.

     The walk to the cafe was easy and she could see him through the large window, sitting tall at a table sipping from a cup and smiling. She watched as his mouth worked, talking to someone inside, probably Sara. He wore a simple navy t-shirt the clung to him. The way he sat, pushed back from the table and leg propped up against his knee, she could see he wore jeans and what looked like heavy hiking boots. The London City Boy dressed down nicely, that was for sure.

     His smile was so warm. She had no choice but to stop and admire it from outside for a few moments. It was amazing, how captivating it was. She had hardly known the man and yet she could hear his laugh in her head. It made her heart feel warm.

     That was almost enough for her. For a second she considered turning around, walking away and leaving things where they lay. She could leave the ghost of what could have been alone, pure in her mind and she would never have to consider how he seemed to capture her attention in the matter of minutes the day prior.

     Was her attention all the kind British man captured? Curiosity, surely. But it was more than that. She was never a romantic one. At least not since she was a teenager. Long ago did she give up on such ideas as 'love at first sight'. He was magnificent though and she couldn't get him out of her mind. No matter what she did all night, he had been there. She was excited to see him again but now that she was there, it was like she was rooted in place.

     She watched numbly as he turned back to his coffee, picking it up. His long slender fingers wrapped around the cup and she was captivated as she watched him bring it to his lips. As he sipped, his eyes closed in clear appreciation of what in her mind had always been average coffee. It was beautiful and she wondered if maybe he was a model of some sort. If not, his cheekbones were going to waste.

     Just when she decided to leave, he turned and caught sight of her. Right before her eyes, he light up with a wide smile that surely she couldn't be the cause of. She was so sure of that in fact that she looked behind her to make sure he wasn't really looking at someone or something else. When all she found was the empty street, she had no explanation for his reaction.

     Turning back to the cafe she watched as he waved at her. One deep breath later and Sofya made her legs take her inside. As she walked through the door, he stood. It was such a old fashioned action, to stand for a lady. She'd never seen anything like it, outside of the occasional old movie.

     “Sofya!” It was confirmed, his voice was just as smooth as she remembered it. “I'm so glad you came. How are you Darling?”

     What exactly did she expect, as he reached out an arm for her? Well, maybe a handshake and so she held hers out to take his. That however was not what he had in mind. Before she could even begin to understand what was going on, Tom had his arms wrapped around her upper back and pulled her in close. Sofya could see Sara's wide grin for a moment before all she could see was Tom's shirt collar and his neck. It was a very nice neck, she had to admit.

     It was decided then, he smelled magical and his t-shirt was as thin as it looked. The sent of sandalwood seemed to fill her nose and she was not one to complain. Pulled tightly against him, she could feel how firm his chest was without even trying. Overall, his upper body had very little give to it. He wasn't built like a house, rather he was very lean and so the amount of muscle she could feel as she awkwardly wrapped her arms up and around his back was surprising.

     He held the hug for just a few beats too long and she was sure that she had somehow caught on fire.

     “Red is a good color on you, Sofie.” Sara called out as they pulled away from each other.

     “What?” How dare this woman who claimed to be a friend point out how badly she was blushing. Surely that was against the law.

     “I was just thinking you should have worn a red shirt. You know, instead of the green one.” Sara was laughing, having the time of her life. Tom had seemed like a good man to her. For now, this could be allowed to happen.

     “Right.” She was going to kill Sara. It was decided. While hiking, she would look for a place to hide the body. She would die slowly, painfully. It was only fair in exchange for the embarrassment since no matter how hard she wished, the floor wasn't swallowing her whole.

     “I think you look lovely in green, Darling.” Tom offered, sending Sara into another fit as he held out a cup for her. “I got you a coffee, while I waited.”

     “Thank you.” Great, now she owed him a shirt, a replacement coffee, the coffee he got her yesterday and now another one from today. Not that she was keeping tally or anything. “I hope you weren't waiting long.”

     “Not at all.” Sara snorted at his words, drawing Sofya's attention for a moment. Tom was quick to steal it back. “Shall we, my dear?”

     “Yeah, okay.” She nodded, sparing a quick glance to Sara who was making large shooing motions with her hands behind his back.

     He guided her out with a warm hand on her lower back, sparing a smile back at Sara. He was growing fond of this little town more and more the longer he spent in it. The people were warm and inviting. Few seemed to act intimidated by him, his fame, money or name. It felt good to be treated so normal while away from home. Some people recognized him, like Sara but almost everyone seemed to work hard to make sure he was treated normal. Friendly banter at a cafe with the barista on shift was something he sorely missed, even if she made point to call him 'Loki'.

     “Lead the way, My Lady. I am at your mercy.” Tom bowed slightly, holding his arm out in front of him in what had to be the most amusing thing she had seen all morning. She couldn't help but laugh at the misplaced formal gesture.

     “This way, Sir Tom.” He looked surprised as she started down the street but was quick to follow. If he was going to act like a Renaissance fair attendee, she would treat him like one. As he caught up to her, she was treated to that laugh of his.

     “We can grab some sandwiches to eat on the way. There is a deli up here. I would have grabbed one when I left but I didn't know what you would bring.”

     “Oh, you've already been passed here? I could have waited somewhere else if it was easier, so we didn't have to back track.” Tom was at her side, smiling down at her in no time.

     “It's only a few minutes wall, not the end of the world.” She shrugged. “Walking is kind of the point, anyway.”

     “That is a fair enough point.” He held the door open for her as she ducked inside.

     “Home so soon, Sofie?” The large man behind the counter called as the door closed behind Tom.

     “Home?” He asked.

     “Just getting fuel. Don't get excited Matt.” Sofya called before turning around to face Tom while walking backward, expertly avoiding chairs and tables. “I rent the apartment upstairs. I've known Matt here all my life. He's nosy, don't mind him.”

     “The usual?” Matt leaned against the counter and watched as Sofya turned back around on her heel. He loved to watch her, ever since she was a child she had a grace about her. The only problem, if she was aware she was being watched, it all evaporated.

     “So plain.” His wife, Marge complained to herself as she set to work making the simple ham sandwich and Sofya smiled.

     “That's just me.” She said with a shrug. “Painfully plain.”

     “And what for you, Pretty Boy?” Matt grinned wide, ever so pleased to see his little Sofie with a man who in his mind could match up.

     “The house special would be fine, thank you.” At the sound of Tom's voice, Marge's head snapped up so fast Sof was worried she'd break her neck. Tom gave the woman a award winning smile before Matt grabbed his attention back.

     “You'd best be treating our Sofie right. And treating her.”

     “Matthew Riggs!” Sofya all but squawked from where she stood watching Marge make the sandwiches.

     “I endeavor to do so for so long as she allows me.” Tom spoke warmly, leaning forward to Matt as he handed over his credit card, eyebrow cocked. It had become clear that while the townspeople were good at pretending otherwise, he wasn't wholly unknown even here. “She seriously has no idea?”

     “Not the slightest. Heads always in a book, that one.” Handing the card back, Matt eyed the man over. “Don't play with her.”

     “I wouldn't dream of it.”

     Sofya was straining her ears trying to hear the conversation between the two men but Marge quickly grabbed her attention, demanding that she let a fine man treat her for once in her life. It wasn't everyday that men like that came around and she may as well enjoy it while she could. Sofya couldn't help feeling guilty however. Just because he wore a nice suit the day prior didn't mean he could afford to carelessly be spending money on someone who he would forget as soon as he left town.

     “That accent though.” Marge sighed, handing Sofya the sandwiches and a few bags of chips as Tom joined them.

     “All set?” Tom smiled down at her and Sofya could swear that she clearly needed to make an appointment with a cardiologist, her heart keep doing weird things. It definitely needed to get checked out and if she got a clear bill from the cardiologist, the next step was to she a shrink because clearly her head wasn't on right.

     “Don't forget to grab some drinks.” Marge called, snapping Sofya out of her daze. Thank god for Marge. Marge had her back, unlike Matt who was just smirking behind the counter.

     “Drinks.” Sofya nodded her head toward the cooler. Way to make a great impression. She wasn't sure when she started to care about that. She was plain, average. He was just bored, nice and in town. He would forget her, she was sure of it, the moment he was on a plane, bag in hand.

     For reasons she couldn't even begin to understand, the very thought pulled at her heart. She allowed herself a moment with that sadness as he pulled two cokes from the cooler, one for her as she requested. He was so achingly handsome and warm. She would trade her soul to be just a little less plain for hope of catching his eye, for hope that when he went back to where ever he came from, he would remember her even for a short while.

     “Everything alright, Darling?” She hadn't even registered when he turned around, too lost in her own thoughts.

     “Yeah.” The word was mumbled even as she put on a smile.

     Setting her small backpack on the table and unzipping it, she deposited the drinks in first, followed by the sandwiches. Chips went on top so as to not get crushed. With a sigh, she slung it up and over her shoulder. Or at least, she intended to. Tom was quick to grab the small strap at the top and snagged the pack out of her hands before it had even touched her back.

     “I couldn't possibly let you.”

 


	3. Hiking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry. I edited this while drunk but I think it's presentable?

 

    It was a short walk out of town. While some towns sprawled on and on sometimes extending into the surrounding area for miles, Grant Arizona was densely packed and tucked right against the hills. Many of its residents like her, walk the trails outside of the town often. It was relaxing and the views were worth the effort.

    Tom kept at her side. His long legs easily kept her pace as they walked between buildings. Sofya had spent all night thinking and trying to decide what trail would be best to take him on but without knowing much about him it was hard to pick what would be best.

    “So my dear, what do you have planned for us?” When she looked up at him, his warm smile was enough to distract her if she wasn't careful. It wouldn’t do to trip over her own feet before they had even gotten started. 

    “Up that hill a ways. The climb isn't too bad overall and the view is amazing.”

    As they came out behind the buildings, the ground began to slop up. In the distance the incline grew steeper. Littering the ground were brown and deep green shrubs who's branches were covered in sharp points. It was hard to miss, but the trails were lighter than the rest of the dusty ground, beaten down but otherwise unmarked like the world surrounding it.

    “This way.” Sofya pointed to a central path.

    After a few steps, she didn't hear the crunch of the dirt under his boots. Maybe he changed his mind, realized he could find much better company than her. When she turned to check if he just walked away she found him looking at her with that warm smile again. The sun shone on his curly hair and the breeze rustled it just a little. He looked so out of place standing at the back of the buildings in the desert yet somehow she knew if she took a picture of him, he would look perfect just the same.

    “Are you coming?” That seemed to snap him out of it.

    “Yes, sorry.”

    The walked in silence for a bit while they made their way up onto the trail. It was easy walking, for now at least as the small town faded into the distance. It would never grow old to her, how quickly you could get away from the town by foot alone. Few had any real appreciation for the distance that could be covered by foot anymore, especially those who lived in the city and traveled by car and train everywhere.

    “Do you come out here often?” Tom asked and she couldn't help but laugh at him.

    It was such a typical line and while she knew he didn't mean it to sound like a pick up line, that was exactly the thought that ran through her head. He wouldn't try to pick her up. She was average. For some reason he just wanted to be around her, she knew. Maybe because she was so below what had to be his standards that she wouldn't get mixed signals. Maybe that made her a safe companion.

    “A few times a month, probably.” She turned and walked backwards as she spoke to him, leading the way without having to look. “It's an old favorite, if you spend the day hiking high enough when night falls you can see Phoenix and all the city lights. Plus the stars.”

    “I'd like to see that.” Her foot slipped on some loose dirt and Sofya decide it was better to watch where she was going. His pretty face couldn't distract her that way.

    “We don't have to.” Surely he wouldn't want to spend the whole day with her.

    She didn't expect him to reach out to her so when his hand closed around hers she was surprised. The shock caused her to misstep and send a rock rolling down the hill. His grip however was firm and kept her steady.

    “I want to.” He said firmly.

    “I didn't pack flashlights.” This was insanity. She was just plain, average. He had better things he could be doing with his time, better people to spend his time with.

    “I did. I've got two torches in my coat, though they are small.”

    What the everloving hell were torches? Her mind dumbly went to the fantasy novels she had read recently, pitch torches lighting castles and tunnels. His hand went into the pocket of his leather jacket and pulled out two palm sized flashlights, clicking one on then off again and she felt stupid.

    “Oh, flashlights.” He laughed at her as he slipped them both into her backpack.

    “They don't flash however. Americans have some weird names for things then call us weird. What did you think I meant?”

    “I'd rather not say.” One foot in front of the other. Maybe if she started walking she could escape the conversation. Unfortunately, his legs were longer.

    “Please?” she could feel the warmth of his breath as he leaned over and spoke into her ear. 

    “Fine! I've been reading some fantasy books and my brain didn't go to flashlight. My brain stayed on torch. Pitch torch.”

    He laughed and it was filled with nothing but pure joy. She expected him to think her dumb. A average girl who hardly left her small town and thus couldn't understand the basic words he used. The weight of his hand settled on her shoulder as he laughed and she couldn't help but crack a smile that slowly evolved into a laugh of her own that died suddenly as he pulled her into his chest for a quick hug.

    “I'm terribly sorry. Forgive me, that was forward.” It ended suddenly as he pulled away, cheeks dusted pink. He wasn't blushing, she told herself. He'd surely have hugged more attractive women than her. It was just the embarrassment of having hugged someone so carelessly, someone so plain as her.

    “Its fine. I know you didn't mean anything by it.” The smile that graced her face didn't touch her eyes but she was quick to turn away just the same. “We've got sandwiches and chips. There is a place to get water up a ways. We could stay out, if you really want.”

    “I do want, with you Sofya.” With a grand flourish of his arm that looked as if it would be right at place on a stage, he waved them forward. “Lead the way, dear lady. Take me to see the the lights and the stars so that I might hope to decide which is more beautiful, the light of the city, the light of the stars or perhaps the light of your smile?”

    “You're a terrible flirt, aren't you?” Sofya didn't look behind her as she began up the trail.

    “If by terrible you mean terribly good at it, then yes. I'd like to think so at least.” She decided right then that she couldn't stand him. She wouldn't stand him. She couldn't allow herself because if she did, if she gave him half a chance she would risk just allowing herself to dare to hope.

    “So what brings you to Arizona, City Boy Tom?”

    A change of subject was better than what she really wanted to ask. It wouldn't do any good to ask him if he flirted with all the girls. Surely he did, because why else would be flirt with her? She was average. There was no reason for him to flirt with her when he could have anyone.

    “Work, mainly. I travel a lot for work however mostly I'm stuck in the cities. I wanted a breath of fresh air and this town was recommended.” Tom shrugged.

    “What do you do?” They quickly reached steeper ground as the trail twisted along, the town fell out of sight in no time.

    “I work in theater, I guess you could say. It's unimportant.” It was clear to her he didn't want to talk about his work, but at least this time she got a bit more information out of him.

    Was he a traveling performer? Perhaps he was a musician, visiting with a orchestra? She'd never known a stage actor to have a beard, so that ruled that profession out but perhaps he worked in production or effects? Maybe even the sound and lights? Eventually maybe he would tell her.

    Who was she kidding? She didn't have until eventually with him. He was there visiting for work, not even because he wanted to be there. When his work was done, he would leave. She would be forgotten. He wouldn't come back. There would be no more time. Why would he want to have more time with her, see here again or even keep in touch with someone as plain as her? He worked in theater, she worked in a average small town bookstore.

    “It's going to start getting steeper here on out, how are you feeling?” If he didn't want to talk about work and she didn't want to talk about his flirting nature, she wasn't exactly sure sure what to talk about.

    “I'm fine.” Tom assured her with a wide smile. Did he ever stop smiling?

    “Just mind your footing, can't have you fall and hurt your pretty face.” Oh dear god, did she say that out loud?

    “You think my face is pretty? Should I be offended that you didn't opt for handsome?” There surely must be something on her face, perhaps a weird look because he was laughing at her yet again.

    “Flirty, fancy suit, pretty face and a job that takes you all over. Some beautiful girl at home must be waiting for you, worried about you slumming around talking up all the local girls everywhere you go.” The trail was getting steep and veering off to the right, winding around a cliff face. The path was wide enough as they walked but Sofya still reached out, grabbing onto the rock wall as they went just the same.

    “No, not at all.” He was beginning to sound winded and regardless, water was a good idea with the sun climbing higher in the sky.

    “She's that comfortable with your flirty ways?” Sofya stopped and sat on the ground, resting her back against the rock wall and stretching her legs out across the path. “Let's get some water and break for a few minutes.”

    There was a comfortable ache beginning to set into her legs, slight as it was. It was a good feeling, knowing the muscles have been worked and stretched. Going all the way to to the top, waiting and going back down would leave her feeling it in the morning. It wouldn't be bad, just enough that would tell her she made a trek the day before.

    Tom handed over one of the two water bottles, taking a long drink out of the other. While he didn't complain, she could see he was breathing a bit harder now. Sofya slipped out of her jacket and balled it up, pushing it behind her back to cut some of the roughness of the wall.

Tom mimicked her, slipping out of his own jacket. The navy blue t-shirt he wore underneath was thin, clingy and clearly threadbare. With the the sun shining on them she could just see through maybe, if she looked hard enough.

    “Are you alright, Darling?”

    With a snap, she realized she had zoned out looking intently at his upper body. It wasn't just his beard and warm smile that seemed to demand her whole attention. His height was commanding enough on its own. But she could clearly see he was well in shape, lean though defined in the upper body. The most distracting thing however was the way she could just make out where his nipples poked at the shirt, making it all the easier to picture him without it.

    Stop looking. Stop looking. Do not drool.

    He was sweet. He was kind. He was warm. He was flirty. He was cute. He was affectionate. He was caring. He was considerate. He was attractive.

    Good god, she needed to find a flaw. Any flaw would do. It wasn't right for a man to be that perfect. Only a god should be that perfect. She wondered if he was a god in some ways. Surely woman called out prayers of praise when with him.

    “Sofya?”

    “Yes. Yep. I'm fine. Totally fine.”

    “I don't have anyone, for the record.” Tom somewhat suddenly spoke.

    “What?” Again her mind went back to his clearly toned chest, matched with the knowledge that he was single. A woman as plain as her, she would never have a man like him to call hers but maybe just for a night? No, she was too average, too plain and would never catch the eye of a man like him.

    A nice long drink of water would cool her down. She had better get a grip, he would never see her like that. A man like that could have anyone, anything he wanted and she was just plain and average. Unfortunately for her, the drink of water wasn't the best of choice as she quickly choked on it. Coughing and sputtering, she tried to get some semblance of control over her lungs.

    “We should get moving.” The words were choked and strangled.

    Sofya stood quickly, unrolling her jacket with the intention of tying it around her waist. The sooner they got moving, the sooner she could try and forget about the regrettable way he had caught her admiring the view of him while he admired the view of the land.

    “Let me? We can put it in the pack with mine.”

    Tom simply lifted the jacket from her hands and bunched it with his and stuffed it inside, setting the chips back on top. Deep down, Sofya knew she would take it home and it would smell like him. The thought made her smile even as she hated herself for it. Damned as she tried not to, she liked Tom and he would just leave taking a part of her heart with him.

    “How long will you be here?” It was a while before she broke the silence again.

    Hiking was peaceful and a comfortable silence was easy to fall into, just listening to the birds and the sound of rodents and lizards scurrying in the bushes. The expansive views seemed to open up around them the higher they climbed. Already they had been walking for over two hours, lunch time was fast approaching and Sofya had no idea how she was going to deal with having to sit down and talk with him.

“I fly out to London Tuesday.” He didn't sound excited in the slightest but perhaps it was simply that he was winded now that the hiking had gotten tougher.

    “Will you be home for a while? Or off on your next adventure right away?” Sofya smiled back at him, the path had narrowed keeping him behind her for most of the hike. “We have a pretty level stretch coming up. That would be the best spot to stop and grab lunch, rest for a bit before we head the rest of the way up. It should be getting close to sunset by the time we make it all the way. Going down will be much faster as long as we watch our footing.”

    “Marvelous, a rest would be most welcome.” Tom laughed, wiping a thin sheen of sweat off his forehead with a small cloth he had grabbed from his back pocket. “I'll be in London for a few weeks, then off to Tokyo for a week.”

    “Do you ever rest?” It was intended as a joke but she honestly couldn't imagine being so on the go.

    “That's what I'm doing here.”

    She looked back at him and just as she expected, he was smiling at her however she didn't expect him to be walking so close behind her. The sun shone against his curls as the wind made them dance softly. The light was hitting his eyes just right and they sparkled the brightest blue. When the wind would shift, she could catch just a hint of what his cologne smelled like and it made her mouth water.

    “No, this is hiking. Look, you're even sweating!” Reaching up, she poked his forehead, collecting a little of the dampness on the tip of her finger as if that would prove anything he didn't already know.

    “Rest.” He countered, stepping beside her as the path turned into a valley between rocks and widened. “I call it rest when I get to walk in the wilds alone with a beautiful guide.”

    “There you go again, flirting away Tom.” Sofya gave a relaxed laugh. It was his way, to flirt and she was determined to not think anything of it and simply accept it. Fighting it would just make her heart hurt. “Beautiful my ass.”

    “I'd say so, yes.” Tom made an exaggerated event out of leaning back and looking at her behind.

    “You're terrible!” She slapped the back of her hand against his chest and regretted it instantly. It was firm and sun warmed.

    “Terribly good, you mean?” Leaning toward her as he spoke into her ear, she could feel his breath moving the stray loose hairs.

    The warmth of his breath against her ear, the smell of him and the meaningless flirting was simply too much all at once. With a squeak, she jumped away from him. In the process, she tripped over a rock, managed to avoid falling into a prickly bush and when she was sure that the ground would leave a nice dusty mess on her ass, she was saved by the very cause of the fiasco in the first place.

    “Sofya!”

    Tom's large hand grabbed onto her arm and pulled her roughly too him. The momentum paired with the incline and loose dirt didn't work in their favor however. The sound of his boot slipping on the dirt seemed to echo. First he leaned forward, trying to catch his footing while clinging her to him before the over correction sent him falling backward.

    It would have been smart to let go of him. To let him fall without her. Sofya however was not known for doing particularly smart things and so rather than let go of him she tried to hold him up and help steady him. As if he didn't weigh significantly more than she did.

    The result was that gravity pulled them both down together. Tom landed squarely on his ass, leaning back when she fell into him. The added weight and the momentum she carried caused him to fall backward. Somehow he was able to right himself enough that the rolled down the incline a few feet on their sides before coming to rest, Tom bracing himself on his elbows as he hovered over her with one arm slipped behind the small of her back and holding her steady against him.

    “Are you alright, Darling Sofie?” 

    She could smell the hint of coffee on his breath, even now as he hovered above her, one knee between her thighs and other resting up by her hip. Warmth radiated off of him and he smelled divine.

    “I'm okay.” Pushing herself up with her elbow, she had expected him to move back and allow her up yet he did not.

    “Tom?” His face was so close to hers now. The thought of what it would feel like to kiss him was something she dared not to entertain.

    “Forgive me. My mind had gotten lost for a moment.” With that, whatever it was that had captured his attention was gone. He sat back on his heels and helped her to sit up.

    “Falling is generally not the goal of hiking.” It was a lame joke, but it was the best she had as he helped her to stand.

    “Ah, and if falling was my goal, dear maiden?”

    It amazed her how he seemed to not even be phased by their close encounter. He was back to flirting and she couldn't help but laugh him off. Somehow she would survive the day, she had to and then she would never see him again. That was surely a good thing.

    “Let's rest up here.” Just ignore him.

    With time, surely her heart would stop beating so fast. She just needed to get some space and practice some deep breathing. Breathing was good. Even better if the air she breathed didn't smell like him. 

    Finding a nice large flat rock to sit on, she enjoyed the view. They made decent time but they still had a few hours walk until they made it to the top. If they took their time eating and enjoyed the rest, they would make it to the top with maybe a hour until sunset. It would be romantic, it was a shame he couldn't really be interested in her.

    “What about you, do you have anyone I'm keeping you from?” Tom sat next to her as he sat the backpack between his feet and made quick work of unpacking their lunch, the question catching her off guard.

    “Not anymore.”

    It had been just over a month since she was dumped the last time and few even knew of that relationship. She was so tired of the looks of hope she would get from Sara that she had decided to keep this one a secret until she was sure it wouldn't end in flames. 

    Of course, many would have said she should have been the one doing the dumping. She had gone to Ben, her boyfriend for just over six months, wanting to surprise him. He lived in Phoenix and was such a handsome man, she had thought herself very lucky.

    The surprise however, ended up being for three people. She had walked in on Ben, on his back with a skinny blonde twig riding him hard. They were both chanting the name of the other. The woman was so beautiful, tight smooth stomach, perky breasts that bounced just enough and perfect skin not marred by a single scar, mole or freckle. 

    For a while after she tired to make it work regardless. Maybe if she had lost some weight, worked out more or had less boring interests he wouldn't stray again. In the end he left her for the other woman, the perfect woman. He told her she was just too boring. She was too plain for him. It was expected.

    “That is lucky news for me.” Tom smiled at her as he handed over her coke. “He must have been a fool to let you go.”

    Sofya tried not to, she really did, but she snorted at his words. As soon as the sound hit her own ears, her face grew hot and she regretted many of her life choices that had brought her to that moment. Running to the edge of the short cliff and diving off to her doom sounded like a good idea at that exact moment. No man should hear her snort. Men don't like snorts. Men like him did not like snorts. It was undignified and not even in the same realm as classy.

    “Hardly. When he found someone better he picked her. It was the smart choice.”

    “Someone better than you?” He scoffed. “I've been around the world and I've not seen such a creature.”

    “You don't have to give out fake compliments, you know.” The smile she offered him felt more like a grimace. “He was too good for me and found someone better. It's alright. That’s life.”

    “Is that what he told you?” Tom didn't look at her as he spoke, rather he appeared to be rather intently focused on unwrapping his sandwich.

    “No. But I'm not stupid.” Sofya unwrapped her own sandwich and set it in her lap, taking a long drink of soda before setting into her lunch.

    “What makes you think she was better than you?” After taking a bite of his own food, he glanced her way.

    “She was perfect. She was skinny and fit. Blonde hair, blue eyes and not even a scar. Perfect body. Studying to be a doctor even. I could never live up to that. Its okay, I know it and eventually I'll find someone.” It hurt to be having this conversation with him. Why the hell did he care?

    “I still say he was a fool. If I'd had a you, I'd never have need to look at another.” The words made her choke on her food.

    “You really need to stop.” Sofya insisted, heart beating wildly in her chest. “I don't mind that you're a flirt but-”

    “But what, exactly?” Tom set the remnants of his sandwich to the side and slipped off the rock, kneeling in front of her. 

    “What must I do, what must I say for you to no longer cast my words aside?”

    “I'm plain.” She admitted. “You're....You.”

    “What does that mean? Of course I'm me, I'm just a man Sofie. A man who looks at you and sees hair that shines like rich honey, eyes that remind me of Swiss chocolates. I see a woman whose body is strong enough to make this hike seem like nothing while I walk behind huffing, confused as I run five kilometers nearly every morning and this is harder than I expected.”

    “You're crazy. I'm just-”

    “Amazing. Beautiful.” Tom cut her off. “And I'd like to know you more, while I can?”

    “Okay.” The word was choked out.

    “You mentioned that you spend a lot of time reading?”

    The subject change was welcome, even if it put focus on her again. In the end, they spent nearly two hours resting in that spot, talking about books, film and theater. Sofya hadn't had the chance to see much live theater and Tom had promised to take her to see something sometime. She didn't ask how he intended to keep such a promise when he was leaving in a few short days. It was better right now to allow herself to pretend, to dream that this amazing man would actually be it for her, that he wouldn't leave and forget her. She surely wouldn't forget him.

    “Crap! When did it get so late?” Sofya stood and stretched, looking at the sun as it begun its slow downward march. “We should get going.”

    Tom was quick to toss the empty soda bottles into the bottom of the backpack, jackets over them. Water bottles came next and lastly the chips were set in. With the pack zipped up, it was effortlessly slung over his shoulder and he was at her side.

    Somehow, while they talked she became more relaxed around him. She couldn't pinpoint when it happened but it probably had a lot to do with his fierce determination to keep her engaged. Still, she couldn't believe that he wanted anything to do with her. In her mind, it was like a fairy tale and once the weekend was over, the bubble would burst and he would be gone. 

    She wouldn't hear from him again and that would be that. But it was too late, she already somehow got attached to the idea of what could be, even as she knew it could never be. The heartbreak would happen, even if she kept pushing him away. Was it a sin to enjoy it, while it lasted?

    “The trail is pretty wide, the rest of the way up.” Sofya spun on her heel, smiling at him as he took his place next to her. The next hour was filled with walking, light jokes and Sofya poking fun at the City Boy walking next to her even as her own legs began to ache more and more, not that she'd tell him that.

    “About 30 minutes left, are you sure you don't want to call it quits?” He laughed at her, even as he tripped over a rock.

    “I work out-”

    “Clearly.” She interrupted.

    “I run-”

    “On flat city paths.” She interrupted.

    “I train with military on occasion.”

    “Oh really?” She didn't have a snarky comment for that one.

    “And this small mountain-”

    “Large hill is probably more accurate.” The half hearted glare he sent her way was completely worth interrupting his mild rant repeatedly.

    “The 'Large Hill',” He went so far as to make finger quotes in the air only to be rewarded with his pants getting snagged on a prickly bush. “is kicking my bloody ass.”

    “You're the posh London City Boy who wanted to go hiking. Don't you know, you're supposed to go to shows in Phoenix, visit the museums and what not.”

    “If I'd have asked you to go with me into the city yesterday, would you have come?”

    It was a fair point. She wouldn't have gone. Never would she have agreed. It was only because he wanted her to take him hiking that they were together, had spent half the day together and would spend the evening together. All she could do was shake her head and look away, he was right.

    Tom seemed to notice the slight shift in her mood and reached out for her hand. It surprised her that he would do such a thing. His hand was warm and strong and as much as she didn't want to allow herself to, she didn't pull away. It felt nice.

    “I am having a wonderful time, truly.” The squeeze of his hand against hers made her smile.

    “I'm glad.” Was all she said in return, walking hand in hand with him along the steep path.

    She left so much unsaid. There was so much she couldn't say. It wasn't fair. It wouldn't be right for her to say those things so she left them in her mind and heart.

I'm glad you wanted me to take you. I'm glad I ran into you. I'm glad I spilled coffee on you. I'm glad you didn't decide to stay in the city. I'm glad you wanted to see the stars. I'm glad we fell and got dirt in our hair. Those were the things she couldn't say, so 'I'm glad' would have to be enough.

    Tom took pity on her and allowed the conversation to move back to simple topics. They talked about weather in the desert, weather in London and how tiring traveling was. To travel so much and to see so much would be nice, she told him. She'd rarely left the state she had been born in. While he missed spending time at home, having the comforts of home and friends nearby, he couldn't imagine not traveling at all. She told him of her favorite book series. He told her of his love of classical plays and how his love took him to working in theater.

    It took no time at all to reach the top, or at least it had felt that way. When enjoying the company of another, time had a habit of moving strangely. They had walked while the sun was setting, lighting the sky in warm orange and yellows. The sunset looked different here, with only a few clouds to be illuminated by the colors. Sofya always thought it to be boring and plain but Tom had been mesmerized just the same, going so far as to have his phone out and snapping pictures.

    “Let's take one together?” Tom suddenly turned to her, asking with a wide smile. It was clear he was having the time of his life and she couldn't help but agree. What else did one do when a man like that requested something as simple as a picture?

    “Okay.” Sofya walked to his side, standing next to him but keeping that distance, just enough to keep things proper. Just enough to try and keep her heart from reaching out to his. Just enough to try and keep her heart out of his reach.

    “Come here, Sofie.” It made her feel things, when he'd call her by one of her nicknames. He never asked if he could, simply heard them from others and occasionally used them.

    It surprised her when he grabbed her high on her waist and pulled her into his side, tucking her in tight against his chest. Holding his phone out with both hands as he was, she was effectively caged in his arms for the pictures. Warmth radiated off of him and she could feel his chest move with every breath he took.

    He didn't just take one photo. No, like a true professional selfie taker, he snapped a good handful as she tried to force a small smile. It took some teasing before he was able to get her to relax against him, a bright smile on her face. When he had a few pictures to his liking, she was actually sad when he dropped a hand from the phone, thinking he was done.

    The hand however wrapped around her waist, coming to rest on her stomach. She had moved to step away but he held her firm. As he turned his head, hiding his nose in her hair she could feel a soft kiss to the side of her head. The whole of her face felt like it was on fire as the click from his phone announced he took one more picture.

    “I think that one will be my favorite.” His voice was different, a touch deeper and perhaps more airy. “If you'd give me your number, I can send it to you?”

    “Tom, I-” What? She was at a loss as to what she was actually going to say.

    “Just give me these few days?” Tom pressed on. “I'll be working most of the next three days. I'll have just one more free day after before I leave. Let me give you my time, what little I have and if you never want to hear from me again when I leave, I'll not bother you.”

    He had spoken the words into her hair, holding her close to him. She was wrapped up in his arms tightly and she couldn't argue with how secure she felt in that moment. Breath hitched and caught in her chest and she could feel the pounding of his heart against her back. How could she, someone so average have such a effect on a man such as him?

    “Why wouldn't I want to hear from you?” The words squeaked a little and she hated herself for it. Just one more reminder of how she wasn't good enough for a man like him. She can't even manage to talk without her voice betraying her.

    “If you don't find me to your liking, I'll step back. I apologize for being so forward but I've enjoyed your company. I don't know if I am willing to risk never hearing your voice again, never seeing your smile without having at least tried.”

    “Why?” She couldn't help but lean into him as the stars began to appear in the sky.

    “Why not?” Finally, his arms fell from around her and Sofya figured it was over. Maybe he realized she wasn't good enough.

    Tom sat on the hard ground, not minding the dirt and dust as it collected in his jeans. With a smile, he reached up to her, snagging her arm in his hand and pulled her down. She came willingly enough, expecting to be pulled to sit next to him. That wasn't his intention however and Tom pulled her into his lap.

    “You really are clueless, aren't you Sofya?” He didn't let her answer. “I told you I wanted to see the stars and the lights of the city. I've decided neither are as beautiful as you. You don't believe me and that's fine but I know and even if you never let me see you again, I'll always remember.”

    The words, the sincerity of them hurt in a way that was almost sweet. Never had anyone spoken to her like that. She'd heard the words before, some variation of them spoken by men of less caliber or looking for a short term entertainment.

    “Sofya, you are more beautiful than all the stars in the sky, all the city lights. You are a pure, untainted beauty in your simplicity. You don't need to primp and polish like the city, because you simply are. Stop seeing yourself as less when you are already so much more.”

    Tears welled in her eyes and she couldn't even give proper voice to why, as she sat draped in his lap, resting with her side against his chest. All while he spoke, she kept her head tucked in his neck, under his chin and he allowed her to. It felt safe that way. It was hard enough to hear him speak such things, things none had very said to her and meant before but to look at him while he did it would have been too much.

    With a fingers under her chin, Tom leaned back and pulled her to look at him. He was warm, everything about him seemed to radiate warmth. His body heat, his smile, the lines next to his eyes, it was all warmth.

    “Sofya,” She watched his blue eyes look up, away from her for a moment before settling back on her. “It is too soon for me to say this but do you believe in love at first sight?”

    “Tom, I-I don't know you?” Why did the words come out as a question.

    “But you could. You could know me like few do.” With a chuckle he continued, speaking softly and leaning in slowly as his words washed over her. “In some ways you already do because you don't know me, oddly enough. You don't know the man the world sees when they look at me. You see me as just a man, one you keep putting out of your reach only because you doubt your self worth based on what? My accent, my appearance and that I wore a nice suit the day prior? I want you to know me, I want to know you.”

    It was the prickles of his beard that she felt first, a short few seconds before his lips ghosted over hers. The kiss was hesitant, as if he wasn't sure if she would push him away or not. Tom cut it short, pulling away just as hesitantly, a sigh on his lips. Sofya hadn't had enough, though she didn't understand why he saw her as good enough, why he wanted her when he could have better. 

    She didn't want to let this moment end. His thin lips were parted and she closed with little space he had put between them, leaning up and into him, circling her arm around his neck to better reach him.

    “Does this mean you'll see me again?” Tom whispered when she pulled back.

    “Yeah, until you find someone better. Until you change-” She couldn't finish the words. Tom's hand was in her hair, pulling her to him. His beard tickled and scratched but it wasn't painful.

    “I'll not.” He whispered between kisses.

 

    Sofya sat on her couch, fingers to her lips as she tried to remember which way was up. A fog of memories danced through her mind as she sat. The only light in the room, in the whole of her little apartment was by the few candles she had lit. It was romantic even if she was in the apartment alone.

    That wasn't to say the walk back down the mountain had gone badly. It actually had been amazing even as they spent most of the time walking hand in hand. She felt giddy as she thought back to him walking her to her door. A chaste kiss shared in parting and the promise that he'd call her when he finished work and returned to town the next night.

    Her phone sat discarded, forgotten about on the coffee table next to the book she had intended to read. It vibrated and chirped, lighting up at the same time all in a effort to let her know she had received a text message. The screen even announced the contact name.

    'Sara: Is he there?' scrolled across the screen, followed quickly by another message. 'Sara: I'm coming over, if I hear moaning I'm not knocking.'

    Sofya laughed to herself and ignored the texts. Sara would come as she said, regardless. The only way to stop her would be to tell her she had Tom over still and that wouldn't do. The next day she'd be bombarded with requests for all the sordid details.

    As Sara walked into the apartment like she owned the place, Sofya's phone vibrated again. A quick glance by both woman revealed the man of the hour was texting her this time.

    'Tom: I had a amazing time. This is my favorite of the pictures.' An attachment was sent before another text came through. 'Tom: This one turned out great too, but I'm rather fond of the other.'

    Sara wasted no time snagging the phone up and opening the attachments. Tom's favorite picture was the one with his hand around her waist, nose touched into her hair and blush high on her cheeks. He sent one of the earlier pictures as well, with her caged between his two outstretched arms.

    “Looks like you had a good time. Got his number even!” Sara teased, handing the phone back to Sofya to quickly text the man back.

    “Yeah. It was nice, a lot nicer than I expected.” She admitted.

    “So, what does he do for work?” Sara plopped on the couch, fishing for details.

    “I'm not really sure. Something theater related. He could be a model or actor, he's so handsome though.” Sofya rested her head in Sara's lap and looked up at the blonde. “He seems to keep his work pretty private.”

    “You're coming with me into the city tomorrow.” Sara blurted out.

    “I hate going into Phoenix.” Sofya complained, knowing full well that somehow she was going to be forced to go regardless of any objections she may have. “Sara? What's it mean when a man asks if you believe in 'love at first sight'?”

    “Did he ask you that?” Sofya nodded. “That means we gotta go into the city.”

    They sat in silence for a while. It was a comfortable silence that seemed to only exist when spending time with someone you'd known for years and felt wholly at ease with. Sara ran her fingers through the brown strands of Sofya's hair.

    “Do you?” Sara's question came softly.

    “What if he realizes he could do better?” Sara pushed her to sit up.

    “Trust me, he can't. You're amazing. If you love him and he loves you, you just need to be honest with each other. If things don't work out, it won't have anything to do you not being good enough and everything to do with him not being good enough for you.”

    Tears welled in Sofya's eyes. It had been a long time since she let such words into her heart. Normally, she would brush them off but everything was still raw from her evening with Tom. It was as if he knocked down every wall, every defense she had. Now she was just worried, scared that she was too plain, too average and that he would wake up and see it. The worst part is this time, it would hurt.

    “What would you do if you were dating a famous person? Like, would you want to hide it or be open?”

    “That's a random question.” Sofya was confused by her friend's words. Maybe she had her eye on a celebrity, maybe even one that visited often. They did have a few of those.

 

    Tom smiled at his phone as he lay on his hotel bed, feet still planted firmly on the ground. His legs ached, his feet were sore and he wasn't even wholly sure why his back hurt. Yet, aches and pains aside, he had enjoyed the day. If he closed his eyes, he could still smell her shampoo carried on the wind. He could still see her smile and hear her laugh, the carefree one she had finally revealed when she had relaxed.

    It troubled him, that she thought so little of herself. Some man, more likely some men, out there made her think she wasn't good enough. If she already doubted if she was worthy of his affections, what would she think when she found out who he was? It was something he should have told her earlier, before he had kissed her. It was addicting, being seen as just any other man.

    What he should be doing is sleeping. His weekend would begin early in the morning. It was nice however, only having had two days of events at least. It gave him breathing room in a schedule that was already packed full of travel and appearances right up to time to begin rehearsals. At least the play was on home territory and he could sleep in his own bed for a good while.

    But home was an ocean away. Home was a massive time difference. Sofya had hardly left her home town, from what he understood. Did she wish to travel? Would she, if she could? Tom groaned and draped a arm over his face, letting the pressure rest comfortably against his tired eyes. He needed to talk to Luke but that could wait until morning.

    Sitting up, Tom did something childish but it made him smile like a loon to himself. With a few taps of his fingers, he set his phone background to the picture he had taken of them. It was his favorite of them all, one of his arm tucked tightly around her waist as he breathed in the smell of her vanilla shampoo.

    She was everything he wanted, everything he had been looking for. A true classic beauty beyond compare, without the countless hours of primping. She was beautiful even after hiking hours, standing at the top of a small mountain (large hill, she kept telling him). He all but told her after not even 24 hours that he had fallen in love and somehow, she didn't fly running down the mountain (hill).

    'Good night, Darling.' Tom typed the message but didn't send it right away. His foot tapped and bounced on on the floor as he sat up. He was acting like a love struck schoolboy. Without a shadow of doubt, he was royally smitten. Was it pathetic to miss someone he'd only known a day? Was it wrong to love someone he'd only known a day?

    The chirp of his phone brought a smile to his face. After the weekend was over, before he left he would tell her everything. He would tell her who he was, what he did. If she would take him, if she could accept him and forgive him for the half truths he had offered he'd give her the world, he'd give her his heart.

    Tom slept well that night. Dreams of honey hair danced through his sleep. Behind his resting eyelids he saw a pair of warm chocolate eyes that shined with more beauty than all the stars within the sky.

 


	4. Conventions

 

    Tom didn't want to wake in the morning. Yet even as he successfully ignored his alarms, Luke was pounding at his hotel door. It wasn't fair. He rolled over with a groan and damned if his back hurt. It wasn't just his back that hurt but his legs screamed at him as he pulled himself out of the bed, looking at his phone, checking the time. He slept through his morning run, figures. With how much pain he was in a run sounded like a terrible idea anyway.

    “Bloody hell.” He grumbled to himself.

    Tom opened the door and slowly dragged himself back to the bed, collapsing face first onto the plush mattress, not offering the man in the hall more than a harsh glance. Would it be considered improper to skip the convention and never get off the bed again? True, eventually he would starve to death but would that be so bad if he didn't have to get up?

    “A mighty fine 'Good Morning' that was.” Luke grumbled, closing the door behind him. “What is wrong with you, Mate?”

    “I bloody hurt. Everywhere.” Tom moaned into the pillow.

    “You said you didn't even go far?” Luke questioned in a mocking tone while pulling a suit out of the closet for his friend and client who clearly wasn't going to be doing any adult tasks such as getting ready at the moment.

    “I know. Yet somehow, I bloody hurt everywhere.” Tom's moaning and pathetic complaining was interrupted by the chirping of his phone.

    Luke watched in amusement as the man who was just acting like he was on death's door sat up, grabbed his phone and perked right up. Three cups of coffee wouldn’t have perked him up that fast. He sat, thumbs working over the digital keyboard on the device as Luke brought over what few things he needed.

    “Shower, now. Then dress and go. I'll get coffee while you wash but if you dally at all, I'm drinking it and we'll be late.” Luke paused to look at the screen. “That her?”

    “Yeah.” Tom smiled down at his phone, showing his friend the background for a moment before facing reality and standing.

    “She really has no idea who you are?”

    “None it seems. I told her I work in theater.” Tom shrugged, slipping out of the t-shirt he had slept in.

    “So you lied to her?”

    “It wasn't a lie. I just didn't specify.” Pants were discarded by the bathroom door.

    “So, what about when she finds out?” Luke was unfazed by the stripping. Such antics were to be expected with Tom.

    “I'll tell her Monday. Maybe Sunday night.” The shower turned on as Tom slipped into the warm water.

    “She's pretty cute. I can see why you like her but really, things are doomed Tom.”

    “Luke, I'll find a way. I'm going to do my best.” Tom shouted over the water.

    “You always do your damned best. You're acting like she hung the moon. You've only known her for a few days. I get it, you're smitten but really Tom? You need to be focused on the press tour and the play.”

    “I love her already.” Tom confessed, rinsing the conditioner from his hair.

    “You're insane, you know that right?” Luke pinched the bridge of his nose knowing full well that his long time friend and client would be the death of him. “Suit today, you have a talk and a Q&A. I'm going for your damn coffee. Be ready when I get back and so help me don't you dare breath a word of this today.”

    Tom couldn't help but smile to himself as he prepped for the day. Sure, his friend had some points and some logic but it didn't change how he felt. Still, she was so timid, felt so lowly of herself that part of him was scared to tell her about his life, who he was. How do you even begin to say: “people line up to take a picture with me after spending hundreds of dollars for the privilege because I happen to be good at pretend” without sounding like an arrogant ass?

    Yet, he needed to tell her soon. She had a right to know what she was signing up for if she even wanted to still see him at all once she knew. Together they had to decide how to tackle things like media and what the public should know about their relationship and when. It wasn't a conversation he was looking forward to having. In his heart he wanted to keep her to himself, keep her separate and forever be just a man, just Tom in her eyes.

 

    Sofya actually screamed when she got out of the shower and walked into her bedroom to see Sara going through her closet. No warning, no asking permission, no 'hey, I'm coming over!'. Sofya wasn't even sure how her friend managed to get into the apartment, the lock had been changed a few weeks prior when her key broke in it and Sara hadn't been given a new key yet.

    “Calm down. I came in through the window.” Sara didn't even turn around as she pulled out a pair of dark blue jeans and tossed them on the bed.

    “The window?” Sofya had a habit of sleeping with the window cracked open and often forgot to close it. Apparently, that was one of the many things in her life that needed changing. “How? Why?”

    “You didn't give me a key. And I climbed the tree.” Sara had the amazing ability to say these things as if they were normal. “Drop the towel, put the underwear and jeans on.”

    “You what?” Why was her life like this? Sofya dutifully dropped her towel and slipped on a brand new lacy thong she knew she didn't buy before pulling on the boot cut blue jeans as ordered. It was better to just do as she was told, Sara was a nightmare to argue with.

    “Don't judge me. New bra in the bag. Put it on. It will make your tits look amazing.” Sofya sighed. “Don't look at me like that.”

    “When exactly did you go into the city to buy me new underwear and why?” Sofya couldn't deny that the bra made her breasts look good, perked perfectly.

    “This top.” A green blouse with gold buttons was tossed at her face. “Last night, after I left here and believe me, you will thank me later.”

    Well now. Today was off to an odd start. Sofya managed to get Sara to at least allow her to do her own hair and makeup, that much was amazing on its own. They slipped on their shoes and before Sofya could even finish her third cup of coffee, Sara was pushing her through the door and down to the car. Sara drove a plain little Toyota Yaris, dark blue and so perfectly her that Sofya smiled every time she saw it.

     Living in such a small town, they rarely took their vehicles out unless they were going into the city so driving was an odd treat. Sofya always liked driving or even just riding while others drove. The passing scenery, the changing of the landscapes all captivated her. Someday, when she had time, money and ambition she would travel. Someday she would see the world and maybe then she wouldn't be so plain. Maybe if she traveled and experienced things she wouldn't be so average.

 

    Sofya and Sara had breakfast at a diner before going to look at coats. Apparently it was terribly important that Sara needed a new coat and it needed to be a classy trench with a tail gathered in the pack. It was nice and Sofya liked it just fine. Next on the agenda was new boots. All the while, Sara kept checking the time on her phone, carefully minding it for some unknown event in the near future that she wouldn't elaborate on that required these updates to her wardrobe.

    Soon, she was dragged to a large convention center covered in comic book characters and people walking around in costumes. Sofya had a magazine shoved in front of her face, told to try and find information on some antique bookstore that Sara wanted to take her too.

    While she was busy, Sara ran off and obtained passes into whatever event this was she was so excited for. Sofya didn't bother looking around, none of it would matter much to her anyway. She never was one for movies or keeping track of actors. That was more Sara's thing.

    “Any luck finding the bookstore?” Sara asked while she slipped a lanyard over her friend's head.

    “Are you sure it's in here?”

    “Yeah, keep looking and follow me. We'll go as soon as you find it. I know how you hate this sort of thing so we'll just be in and out.”

    Sara was grinning like a kid on Christmas day. Somehow she managed to navigate Sofya through the crowds without her noticing any of the large banners with Tom's face on it. It was amazing how dense her friend could be. Sofya was looking through the magazine diligently for a bookstore that didn't exist. The plan was working perfectly. It was too good to be true. Now all she had to do was keep Sofya clueless while they sat and waited.

    That wasn't hard to do. Sofya was happy to get a chance to sit in the small auditorium, away from the crowds. A banner above the stage proclaimed it to be some talk on something or another. She didn't care enough to read it as the room quickly filled. They were sat near the front, some VIP area it seemed.

    “Sara, I can't find anything on a bookstore in here.”

    “Maybe I was wrong?” With a shrug, Sara out the question off as if it was nothing.

    “What is going on?”

    “Just sit. It will be fun, I promise. Now shut up, they are dimming some lights. It's starting soon.”

    A man came out on the stage, holding a microphone and welcoming the crowd. He asked if they were excited and received cheers in return as he sat down and introduced himself, talking for a few moments about what sounded like a superhero movie that left most everyone in the room emotionally traumatized. Sofya couldn’t understand getting invested in a superhero movie.

    Sofya was honestly not paying much attention at first while Mark sat and addressed the crowd. He stood and she didn't think anything of it when he held out his arm to the side of the stage in welcoming and people began to cheer. The soft sound of boot steeps could just be heard as a person walked across the stage.

    “I have Tom Hiddleston joining me today!” Sofya didn't even glance up from the game she was playing on her phone. Tom was a common enough name, she knew many Toms. Yet his last name was ringing bells as she tried to remember where she had heard it before.

    “It's a true pleasure to be here, Mark.”

    That voice however made her head snap up so fast her neck actually popped with the action. The loud pop or maybe the sudden movement drew Sara’s eyes from the stage to her. On the stage, taking a seat in an overstuffed chair with a microphone in hand was Tom. Long legs crossed and hand running through his hair, he looked just the same. The suit he wore was even similar to the one she had dumped coffee on what felt like a lifetime ago. The stage itself couldn't even begin to contain the warmth that seemed to radiate off of him.

    They talked about some movie and Sofya couldn't follow it. She couldn't think. Thoughts would not form. At least none that were coherent. The sound of his voice, his laugh filled her ears and she didn't understand. All these people, this whole room was grouped together to see him? It didn't make sense, this was the same man she was hiking with the day before, the very same man that she had kissed.

    Tom laughed and shifted when Mark asked how he had been enjoying his visit to Arizona. Pink looked to tinge his cheeks but surely that was just the lights. It must have been warm up on that stage and he was wearing such a well tailored gray suit. The warmth would tint his cheeks, surely. He couldn’t blush over such a question, would he?

    “It's been nice, very nice.” Dumbly Sofya watched as he fidgeted with his glasses, pulling them off his face and cleaning them before placing them back, only to adjust them repeatedly.

    “Do anything fun? Other than hanging with me, of course!” They both laughed and Sara watched as Sofya was completely captivated watching him.

    “So?” Sara whispered but didn't get any answer.

    “I uh- went hiking yesterday.” A smile warmed his face, touching his eyes and Sofya knew that smile, she had seen it up close.

    “Oh, how far?” Mark leaned forward.

    “I'm not sure. Not far, not far at all but I'm feeling it just the same.”

    “Kicked your ass, did it?” Mark laughed

    “Oh it did! But I managed to get some nice pictures out of it. It was great, really. I had a blast.” Tom smiled across the small way to the man. Doing these interviews was something he always enjoyed.

    “So Tom, I've got a bet here from Little Tommy that you won't play the text game. Come on how, we all want you to play.” Tom laughed, it seemed innocent enough. He hardly texted and all his contacts were entered into his phone. He hardly used his phone for anything top secret or that would cause scandal.

    “What? I've got nothing to hide. I can play, I'll play.” Leaning to the side, Tom slipped his phone out of his back pocket, unlocking it with his fingerprint and handing the device over without thinking twice. What harm could a simple game cause, really? He was honestly such a boring man, enjoying his books, music and work.

    “Cute picture you got there.” Mark commented, reminding Tom right then about the impulsive and childish move he had made the night before and how big of a mistake he may have just made. “Taken while hiking?”

    “Yeah, thank you.” Tom fidgeted in the seat, running his hands over his beard, through his hair and fiddling with is glasses again. He had miscalculated but at least she wasn't there. There was still time to be the one to tell her. He could still explain himself and who he was before she found out from someone else.

    “Okay, you're most recent received text message...” Mark paused, clicking through. “From Sofie: Good morning to you too.”

    “Well, that's boring. Nothing juicy at all.” Mark lamented as he handed the phone back. “Sofie though. Was that her?”

    “I like to keep my personal life private.” Tom tried to sidestep the question, knowing full well he wouldn't get away with it.

    “Everyone wants to know, is there someone?”

    “I-ah.” Tom cleared his throat, scratching at his neck and shifting uncomfortably in his seat. “I once said if there was anyone special to me, I'd be the one to say it. Things are very early on but I will say I've found someone I care for a great deal. I'd like to see what happens, it's too early to say and I hope everyone respects that and gives her, gives us space the space to explore it.”

 

    “You knew?” Sofya sat dumbfounded. “That's why you asked last night.”

    “Yeah, I knew him the moment I saw him.” Sara admitted as the men on the stage shifted the topic of conversation away from romance and to impersonations.

    “He's,” She swallowed the panic that kept trying to bubble up in her throat. “He's a big deal?”

    “Kind of, yeah.” Sara nudged her friend. “I mean, he has a pretty big fan base as you can see but he's not like superstar big otherwise he couldn't walk around Grant without a bodyguard and all that. Are you okay?”

    “Why?” Her voice squeaked. “Why me?”

    “You'd have to ask him.”

 

    “We'll be opening up for audience questions.” Mark announced and Tom inwardly cringed.

    This was it. If he was going to have to suffer for his simple miscalculation, now would be the time. Some fan who was possessive or maybe simply slightly crazy would say something about Sofya. They wouldn't like that she wasn't famous. They wouldn't like that they didn't know who she was. Her anonymity would mean they couldn't pick her apart and that would irritate them. He loved his fans, he truly did but he was far from blind to the toxic nature of a small dedicated group of them. It was why he didn't participate in social media much of the time. It was also why he shied away from dating since his last less than stellar attempt.

 

    Sara stood from her seat, dragging Sofya with her. She couldn't argue, too lost in her own mind to fully think. Why hadn't he told her himself? Why did he want her? What did any of this mean? To him? For her? She didn't pay any attention as Sara dragged her into a line. Sofya just watched and listened.

 

    “Is miss Sofya someone you worked with?” The first question, he couldn't catch a break.

    “No, I don't work with her at all and I'd rather keep details about her private.” Tom tried to appear relaxed as he answered even as he feared the whole Q&A session would be about someone who didn't even agree to be talked about.

    “I hope she's not taking advantage of you being a star.” The woman grumbled as the microphone was pulled away.

    “Hardly. She sees me as none of you do, a man.” He told himself to let it slide. Don't answer. Don't fuel them but the slightly sharp response was past his lips before he could stop himself.

    “Next question.” Mark waved the person away, looking apologetically to Tom.

    “For a Brit, you're a good tipper.” That voice snapped his attention to the crowd.

    When asking a question, the fan was brought into a light so he could see them clearly. Standing in the light was Sara. Just behind her, out of his view was another person. Good god did he hope it wasn't  _her_.

    “Do you have a question too?” Mark asked laughing.

    “Sara?” Tom choked on her name.

    “When were you planning on telling her?” Sara grinned at him.

    “I ah-”

    “Don't worry, I helped you out. Only fair since you tip so well, consider it part of the cafe service.”

    To his absolute horror, Sara reached behind her and pulled the person forward by the arm. The one person he had been missing all day was here. The one person he would have given anything to see was here. He choked on air, making what had to have been a highly undignified sound that was caught by the microphone.

    “Tom, are you alright?” Mark asked, looking at his pale face.

    “Sofya.” The crowd murmured as he choked on her name.

    “Tom?” The microphone didn't pick up her voice well, it was still mostly in front of Sara but it did a well enough job.

    “Bloody hell. Sara, what are you thinking?!” Tom stood, raking his fingers through his hair and paced for a moment before jumping off the stage. “I was going to tell her. I was going to explain everything to her. I just- I just needed time.”

     Long legs took him down the small path between the crowds as he rambled. All eyes were on him. He could hear the questions they spoke. He could hear Mark and the event coordinators behind him.

    “You just- you tossed her to the fire. I was going to tell her. I was but I just wanted time.” His attention shifted between Sara and Sofya. “I swear I was going to tell you. Let me explain before you run from me, from this madness that is my life.”

    “Why?” Sofya choked out, stepping toward him.

    “Why?” Tom parroted back.

    “Why didn't you...” She weakly motioned toward everyone around them. “I'm not- In no way am I good enough for this...”

    “Sofya. Bloody Hell Sofya. I didn't tell you because you didn't know me for this. All of this? You didn't see me and see Actor Tom. You just saw some bloody British bloke who spilled his coffee on you.”

    “I spilled mine on you.” She countered softly as he kept speaking over her, well on a roll.

    “You just saw me. You smiled at me and laughed at me. It took hiking up a fucking mountain-”

    “It was a large hill.” The crowd around them laughed softly. For the most part, their spectators stood silent allowing them to be as alone as they could in the packed room.

    “Fine. A bloody very large hill for me to convince you to give me a chance, that I saw you as good enough for me. And the damned truth is that it is me that isn't nearly good enough for you. Yet, I want to try for as long as you let me. Try to live up to the man you think I am, to always be better. Bloody hell, why haven't you run yet? I’m rambling.”

    “Kiss her!” Someone from the crowd yelled suddenly.

    “You can run, if you'd like. It would kill me but I won't stop you.” Tom whispered, suddenly aware of his voice filling the room just the same.

    “What if I don't?” Sofya's voice was picked up by his microphone and the microphone Sara had taken hold of at some point.

    “Then somehow, we give things a try?” Tom watched as Sofya bit her lip, blush dark on her face.

    “Why me?” Softly, she inquired again.

    “Do you believe in 'love at first sight'?” He stepped closer.

    “I think I do now.” Reaching out, Sofya took his suit between her fingers, running her hand down the smooth fabric.

    “It's terribly soon and we are doing this in front of the world. Is that alright?” Another step took him closer to her still as he took her hand in his.

    “I'm scared,” She admitted. “But I don't want to hide.”

    Tom's lips met hers in a sweet kiss. The microphone bumped into her face and the sound of their breathing filled the room. The kiss was over before it could begin as Tom pulled away.

    “I should probably get back up there.” Glancing back at the stage, event organizers standing awkwardly around.

    “Okay.” Fingers tangled with his for a moment.

    “Wait for me after?” Tom asked as she nodded.

    Pointing at Sara, Tom spoke before jogging to the stage. “I'm never trusting you again. Or tipping you for that matter.”

    All the while, as he made his way to the stage Sofya stood stock still with her fingers resting on her lips. The crowd, people around her cheered and hooted. Some strangers congratulated her as if she had gotten engaged or something.

    “She's even prettier in person.” Mark commented as Tom bounded up onto the stage, laughing and looking all the lighter.

    “She is a vision indeed. Sorry for the interruption.” Tom apologized as he took his seat again, waving his fingers at Sofya one last time.”

    “Not problem at all. None. Poor girl looks shell shocked and I think you owe us all a story now.”

    Tom and Mark laughed and joked as Sofya and Sara took their seats again. As she watched on, blush high on her face Tom told the story of how they met, of the hike and sweet pictures. Tom found it nice, being open from the start. It brought him great pleasure to sing her praises for all to hear, to tell the world how much she already meant to him.


	5. Whiskey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well loves, this is the end and you are getting it a little early as a happy birthday to myself. Thanks for hanging with me. Maybe I'll see you around- next up is Mermaid's Christmas and a series of one shots.

Sofya wasn't sure where she should wait as the room emptied. Lucky for her, an event organizer snagged her as she slowly made her way out. If not, she was sure the crowd would have swept her up and she would have been lost, ushered on to some unknown next event. Sara had slipped away before the event was over, leaving her alone and trusting Tom to get her home safely.

“This way, Ma'am.” The large man said and she cringed even as she followed him.

“Not Ma'am, that was my Gran.” The man laughed at her, relaxing nearly instantly. How odd was that? He had no reason to be yet he had been nervous. Was it because of who her boyfriend was? Was he even her boyfriend?

 

Tom was pacing in the hall behind the stage in a flurry of nervous energy, fiddling with his glasses in his hands before finally tucking them into his jacket pocket. Try as he may, he couldn't help it. Logically he knew he didn't have anything to worry about… probably. She had accepted him before, in a hall full of people. The people had cheered and rooted for them, oddly enough. But she was put on the spot at the time, would she still feel the same in an empty hallway?

That was all beside the fact that now he was lost, not even sure which way was up. Never would he thought he would kiss someone during an event, in front of his fans and the world. At least, not someone he actually cared about without being scripted. It had felt good, to be and act as if the world wasn’t watching him but that didn’t change the fact that the world was indeed watching and would be talking before long. In no time at all they would be picked apart, some people would be cheering for them and others would be picking apart her faults and trying to put a wedge between them.

The door opened and he stopped mid-step and turned. She walked through and he couldn't understand how she managed to be so beautiful under the harsh fluorescent lights. Somehow though her hair wasn't lit by sun, it still looked soft, smooth and so warm as she walked up to him.

“I feared you'd not come.” Tom admitted, reaching out for her.

“Why wouldn't I?”

“Sofya, I'm so sorry.” His hands were warm on her arm.

“What for?” God he couldn't believe how clueless she was. He loved that about her, how she was both so damned smart but when it came to him and to his life she was so clueless.

“You were put on the spot. If you want to change your mind? I won't like it but- what ever you want. I'll understand. If you don’t want this, if you don’t want me anymore- I’d understand. Or if you do but don’t want all this, we can try and-”

Tom's rambling was cut off suddenly. Sofya had closed what little space between them and he hadn't even noticed. Hesitantly, her lips moved over his. The soft kiss was all it took to shut him up. The weight of her hands on his chest was comforting.

“You could have told me.” Sofya whispered as his arms curled softly around her back, holding her lightly.

“And doubt?” Tom walked them backward and sat down heavily on a hard metal folding chair. “Doubt in my darkest moments that you want me for anything more then this. Doubt that I'm really good enough for you. I needed to know what that this was based on me, Tom not that Tom, the one they see.”

How could a such as him hold such doubts? Sofya was mystified. It made no sense to her. She was the one who should hold doubt. After all, she was the one that was plain and average. She was the one who worked in a bookstore. She was the one who was nothing.

“Why wouldn't I?” Tom clutched at her as she spoke.

“Some days it feels like that is all anyone sees.” Tom admitted, looking down at her feet as she stood in front of him with his arms around her waist. “Thanks to Sara, the world is going to be watching us too. It won’t ever be just us again. People will always be talking. We won’t have any privacy, though we can try. God, I should have pulled you in the back right away, what was I thinking?”

“I don't care about all of this. I’m too boring for them to talk about long.” Sofya rested her forearms on his shoulders, fingers playing in the hair that hung around the collar of his suit jacket. “I just don't understand why me when you can have anyone in the world, actresses, models- anyone?”

Was it odd for them to be laying things bare while standing in the back hall at a convention center. This wasn't where he expected to be sitting with her, more vulnerable than should he be naked. He hadn't had a plan of how or when he was going to tell her. He hadn't gotten that far at all but this was not how he pictured it going. It was something he should have done in private. It was something that should have been just between them. The world didn’t need to be a part of it. His fans didn’t need to be a part of it. Yet, his fans were a part of his world. That was a fact he couldn’t keep running from, hiding from.

“Well, that happened.” Luke spoke from down the hall only to be ignored. Typical.

“I had asked you if you believe in 'love at first sight' when we were on the moun- large hill.” She smiled at him when he corrected himself. “I asked because I do. The very moment we collided, my heart abandoned my chest and has never left you, not for so much as a fleeting moment. I want you to call mine, only you. Nothing would make me happier than to know you would call me yours.”

“Okay.” Sofya whispered, running her thumb over his neck and along his jaw as he kept talking, seemingly having not heard her.

“We can figure out the fans, the fame and time. We can't hide, not really with Sara's stunt the world will know about you but you don't have to be a part of that if you...”

She watched the moment it clicked in his mind. His head shot up and his breath fanned over her. It was amazing, how intense his eyes were even in the harsh light without the glasses to block them. It felt almost as if she was drowning in them.

“Okay?” The word was more of a breath on his lips.

“Okay.” She confirmed with a nod. “Whatever comes next, whatever this means- Okay.”

“What about them? This? All the eyes?”

“I'd like to know your plan for that as well.” Luke voiced, attempting to be acknowledged.

“Let them know. They come with you but they are not you. I’m boring, plain and they’ll what? Point it out? I already know it. They’ll tell me you could do better? You could. But for as long as you want me, I’m here. You're Tom and I dumped my coffee on your suit. Oh God. How expensive was that suit?”

Tom laughed at her as he ran his hands up her arms to rest a hand on her cheeks. How was she so perfect? How was she so accepting? For all that was sprung on her, she just smiled at him and said 'okay'. One of the only things she seemed to care about was how expensive of a suit she had ruined. How was it that he was blessed to find an angel with eyes richer than any chocolate he had tasted and a heart more pure. Nothing he had done in his years made him worthy of her.

“I should probably be angry.” She mused.

“I had expected as much. Deserve as much in all honestly.” Tom tilted his face up even as he pulled her down by him.

“For fuck's sake.” Luke mumbled, turning on his heel and leaving as their lips met in what was a sweet kiss.

 

Sara left Sofya stranded at the convention but she was blessed enough to be provided refuge in the back rooms. Tom was ushered about, here and there. He'd pop in and rest for a short spell, enjoy a bottle of water and they would talk. People asked about her, he confessed but he was always quick to assure her that he wasn’t saying any more. They already knew more than enough. People were being kind about it, at least for now.

Things felt normal and natural between them. During those times when he was by her side and they joked about at what point a lump of land would be permitted to be called a mountain and no longer a large hill. But when he was called away to sit at a panel or sign autographs, her mind was her own worst enemy.

Doubts filled her mind as she was sure they would fill the mind of any average woman found in her position. What were they saying about her? What did they think about her? Was he regretting it? Would he? It would be easy enough to check. Surely with how big of an event this all seemed to be she would be able to find information online?

“Don't bother.” Luke spoke, sitting down in the chair next to her. “You second guessing things? Worrying? Thinking about going online to have a peek? Trust me, it’s not worth it.”

“I ah... I just.” She sighed., putting her phone back into her pocket “Maybe? I just don't understand why me? Everyone's probably telling him that he can do better. They’re right, you know.”

“Don't start that rubbish.” Luke's hand was heavy on her shoulder as he spoke. “Tom was worried about you. He sent me, you know? I could never understand it, he always falls hard and fast. It always leaves him heartbroken in the end.”

“What?”

“They leave him, they always do. It's hard for him not to feel defective because of it. I try and tell him that they are the ones with the issues, just using him to get higher on the ladder. He swore he gave up on love, on finding anyone because he was tired of being used. He's terrified that you'll leave him too now.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Sofya's fingers fidgeted and picked at her clothing.

“Because he may be my client but he is also my friend. As his friend I can tell you this: He can be bloody daft at times. Tom believes in 'love at first sight' but he knows it takes more than that to make anything work. If you give him your heart and accept his in return, if you are willing to always see the man and not the actor; Tom will give you the world.”

“Why me?” She muttered, looking down at her hands.

“Why not you?”

“I'm not good enough.” The words stuck in her throat. It was almost painful to force them out.

“Who says?”

“Well... I mean...I'm just...” Luke didn't let her finish her ramblings.

“Does it matter what the fans think?” He pressed.

“No, I guess not but if they are right?”

“Does it matter what people who don't know you think?”

“Well no but-”

“Does it matter what people who've only ever seen you in a few photos think?” Luke was on a roll, not really intending to let her speak once he heard that one word he wanted.

“No,”

“Does it matter what people you'll never meet think?”

“No.”

“Does it matter what I think?”

“I mean, I-”

“No, it doesn't.” He corrected her with a firm shake of the shoulder under his hand. “Does it matter what anyone other than you and that man down the hall thinks?”

Tom was down the hall awkwardly leaning against the wall. Somehow, he made even that look good. Luke knew he was there but that was half the point. Tom could hear everything Luke said, the empty hall echoed yet they had privacy from the crowds and fans. Some of the fans would love to hear the doubts she had so that they could latch onto them and try to use them to pull her from him.

Already he had heard a few talk of how she wasn't good enough for him. It was such talk that he had wanted to protect her from, to hide her from. It wasn’t realistic, he knew. To do that, he would have had to hide her, hide his love for her and that would only fester more doubts. Somehow he had to balance it all. How does one ever balance trying to maintain privacy without hiding.

“Tom?” It was almost a squeak, her voice tight with her worry.

Luke stood with a respectful nod to his friend and left them as Tom's long strides took him to her. Rather than taking a seat next to her, he knelt in front of her. With trembling hands, he picked up hers.

“My darling Sofie, can't my opinion be the only one that matters? I say you are more than good enough for me.” His eyes were so piercing.

“What about-”

“It doesn't matter.” Tom took a page out of Luke's book and interrupted. “Let it just be us? No matter who is looking, no matter who is talking, let it just be us? I'll deal with them, I'm used to dealing with them. Bloody hell, I pay Luke to deal with them. You don't have to look at it, you don't have to listen to what anyone else may say. Just let it be me and you? Please?”

“Okay.” Again, it was just one simple word and it amazed him.

 

Things just seemed to fall in place when his day came to a close. For all her doubts, for all her insecurities she couldn’t help but to smile when she saw him walking up to her. He was clearly tired, his glasses resting on the top of his head as he rubbed his eyes but when he set sight on her a warm smile lit up his face just the same.

“Shall we slip out the back?”

“Lead the way.” Slipping her arm through his, Sofya allowed him to pull her along.

“Where to, M’lady? Back to Grant or could I dazzle you with anything else?” His hand was warm, resting on hers after putting his glasses properly on his face. “We can get dinner and drinks here in the city or head back to town?”

Sofya thought for a few moments before answering, “Let’s stay in the city. I think it’s best we talk.”

“More terrifying words never have been spoken.” Tom murmured as they walked.

 

The restaurant they pulled up to looked fancy. Sofya worried she wasn’t dressed well enough but Tom looked at her warmly from the driver seat. She looked fine in his opinion and she had to admit, she was dressed just as well as some of the people milling about in front of the heavy glass doors, thanks wholly to Sara’s handiwork.

“You’re okay with this?” His hand was warm on her leg. “I’ll probably get recognized here, people may take some pictures without asking. God, I sound arrogant, don’t I?”

“That’s a fact of life for you, isn’t it?”

“It is.” He admitted reluctantly, a blush dusting his cheeks. “If I’m lucky my career will only continue to progress. The attention to my private life is a side effect of that. I try to keep things private but I can’t always.”

“It’s okay.” With a squeeze of her hand over his, Sofya reassured him best she could with that simple word again.

 

The hostess was kind enough to seat them out of the way, having a table reserved for them in a somewhat private corner. Tom most have called ahead at some point but Sofya appreciated that he still gave her the option without pressuring her with a standing reservation.

“You wanted to talk?” Tom pressed after they sat in silence waiting on their meals and sipping red wine.

“You could have told me, you know?” Sofya wasn’t sure what she wanted to say anymore. Things felt so right but still she felt unworthy of his attention. She saw the way that people’s eyes followed him, she saw the couple seated a few tables away with their cell phones out. It didn’t go unnoticed by her and she was sure he knew as well.

“I know. I was going to. I just wanted to be sure.” His hand found hers again as she glanced at the couple one more time. “I can have the waitstaff ask them to stop or move them, if it would make you feel more comfortable? It would give us more privacy.”

“It’s fine, they are just curious about why someone like you is with someone like me.” Sofya shrugged. “What did you need to be sure of? That you wanted me? It’s okay, I’ll be okay when you change your mind, you don’t have to be sure.”

“Sofya,” His voice had a hardness to it that drew her eyes to him. “I wanted to be sure that if you cared for me, it was for me and not for what they see.”

Tom motioned with his head to the couple, the woman still head her phone in her hand but Tom paid no mind as they couldn’t hear their conversation. So what if some footage of him and Sofya in discussion made it to Youtube or Tumblr. So what if they didn’t look exactly like lovebirds every second. It didn’t matter because with her, he was real.

“Sofie, I wanted you to want me for the man I am, not my job or name. You’re too perfect for me, too beautiful inside and out that it would have crushed me if you’d only wanted me for that. It would crush me still if you’d turn your back on me because of that.”

“I do.” Sofya rested her hand on his, stilling the fingers that had been busy fidgeting with the napkin. “It scares me how much I do, honestly. I’m not good enough for you and that scares me.”

The food came, interrupting the conversation and giving Sofya a few blessed moments to think. She needed the time. Questions and doubts flooded her mind. Yet, when she looked at him under the warmth, under the veneer of confidence she could see that he housed his very own doubts. Such a strange idea, that a man as amazing as this would hold a single doubt.

Pushing her anxiety aside as she set her fork down, swallowing a mouthful of chicken. The food was amazing, the wine warmed her blood and if not for the weight of doubt hanging over the table the evening was amazing. If they were to have a chance to be something more than just a weekend, she needed to take a risk.

So what if she got hurt sometime in the future, it wouldn’t be the first time but what if just maybe Tom was someone who would be around for longer, regardless of the hurt and hardship his career could and likely would bring?

“Tom?” Her voice was soft but drew his eyes to her in question just the same. “You asked me if I believed in ‘love at first sight’ and-”

“You don’t have to. I shouldn’t have-” Tom interrupted, covering her hand in his and holding it firmly, almost desperately as she cut him off again.

“Shut up for two minutes, won’t you?” Sofya sighed as his mouth snapped closed. “You asked if I believed in it. You said you did and that you wouldn’t pressure me with it, I know. You said you wouldn’t say it again until I was ready. I don’t- I didn’t believe in that, in ‘love at first sight’. But some people don’t believe in ghosts until they see one. I’m not making sense, please make me stop.”

“I find myself confused.” Tom admitted, a small smile playing on his face while running the pad of his thumb over her hand. “Am I to speak or stay silent?”

Sofya actually glared at him and while he tried, he couldn’t contain the laugh that burst forth. Try as she may, she looked like an angry kitten and clearly not much to be feared. It didn’t take long for her to melt and the sound of her laughter to join his, drawing a few more eyes to them. It didn’t matter, let them have their pictures, let them have their gossip. Somehow, she had Tom and Tom had her.

“Am I to take from your words that now you believe in it? You don’t have to say it, not until you’re ready but if you believe enough to give me a chance...”

“I do.” Sofya glanced down for a moment, blush high on her cheeks before her eyes met his. “It’s scary but I do. I have no choice by to believe in something as crazy as ‘love at first sight’ because...Because I love you already and that is insanity. I loved you before I knew you. I loved you when we hiked up the hill. I loved you when I thought you just worked behind the scenes in a theater.”

Tom smiled at her, blushing at the admission he so badly had wanted to hear. “I love you too. I loved you yesterday and the day before. I love you today. I’ll love you tomorrow and next week. I’ll love you next month and Sofya, if you’ll let me- if you accept me I’ll love you until my last breath. We’re in this together, through all the trials that may come for so long as we both wish it.”

It was just like that, the weight was lifted again. They ate and talked about whatever crossed their minds. Childhood stories were traded along with stories from work. Sofya was amazed to find he was just as captivated and entertained by her stories of the bookstore as she was his stories of travels, sets and stages.

“You’re going to Tokyo next?” Sofya asked as massive slice of chocolate cake was set between them along with two glasses of whiskey. How long they had been sitting there, talking and drinking, she couldn’t say.

“Yeah. The flight is going to be bloody terrible, it always is.” Tom shrugged before continuing, “It’s another convention, like what brought me here.”

“You looked like you enjoy them at least?” Sofya closed her eyes and sighed over the taste of the chocolate cake.

“I do, yes. But it will be nice to be home.” Tom savored the cake and the smooth burn of the whiskey. “I know it isn’t ideal, I know I’m going to be away from you more often than not but I’ll call, we’ll be in touch every day. I’ll come see you when I can and maybe when you have time you can come and see me.”

“Tom.” Sofya hesitated, this was one of the issues she feared. “I don’t have the kind of money you have. I can’t just take off time to go traveling. I can’t just take time off work.”

“I can take-”

“No, Tom. Don’t you see? If we did that it would look like that’s why I want you.”

“I don’t care.” He insisted, draining the whiskey from his glass while waving for the waiter to bring another. “Let them talk, isn’t that what you said? Let them gossip. If you want to come visit me I’ll not let something I can solve stand in our way. They don’t have to know. If you simply don’t wish to travel, that is well and fine but if you do wish to, you can.”

Sofya drained her own glass as two more were placed in front of them.

“Okay.” She whispered before repeating the word stronger a second time.

If they were going to do this, she had to compromise. He had much to offer and he was offering it all. Such things as being able to go see him occasionally could make all the difference in a long distance relationship. And that was exactly what they would have, in the end. He was there now, with her but in just a few short days he would be gone and she couldn’t even begin to guess when she would see him again.

 

“Well, shall I call a car to take us back to town?” Tom swayed a bit on his feet as they stood, each having had their fair share of drinks.

“That would be expensive.” She protested, nearly knocking over an empty glass as she failed at swinging her coat over her shoulders.

“Let me help you, Darling Sofie.” He plucked her jacket out of her hands and helped her into it. “I fear I’ve failed to tell you how magnificent you look today.”

“Thank you. You look...I’m bad at this.” Sofya was tripping over her words.

“Thank you.” His arm rested on her lower back as he guided her through the restaurant, sparing the couple that had spent much of their time watching them a smile and a nod.

“I could get us a room here in the city, if you’d like?” A blush dusted her cheeks at the implications and his own blush seemed to explode across his chest and face. He didn’t mean it that way. “Or rooms. I wasn’t trying to be forward or-”

The backpedaling was stopped when in the middle of the restaurant, in front of the world where anyone and everyone could see, Sofya turned and rested her hand on his chest. It was warm, even through his suit jacket. Looking down into the warm chocolate of her eyes, his words stopped mid sentence.

He was helpless before her, lost in her as he looked down at her. Slowly she pushed herself up on her tip toes and leaned into him. For the first time, Sofya kissed him and he was stunned, eyes wide. Around them he knew a few people had their phones out but she didn’t seem to care and so he swallowed the urge to hide.

He had been backpedaling, panicking over words that meant something more than intended and in front of the world she shut him up with a kiss. And what a kiss it was. Tom sighed into it as his eyes closed and he wrapped an arm around her waist. For the second time, he kissed her regardless of the world watching. He kissed her like a regular man would.

She knew he wasn’t a regular man. She knew the world would watch and she did it anyway. To have someone pretend that eyes were not on them, that they were just two people was refreshing. It had been a very real fear of his that when she found out, the way she acted around him would change. He expected it. Anonymity provided a type of privacy regardless of where they were and he couldn’t offer that. But still, she treated him as if he was but a normal man.

Pulling away a short distance, she whispered: “A room in the city would fine...If that’s okay.”

Tom’s hand went to rest against her neck, fingers playing with her hair. With one last breath he brought their lips together again. This kiss held a hunger to it. She clung to him as he held her tightly against him. Knowing the truth, she treated him as just a man that she loved. It was freeing. It made him feel free to act as such, just a man with a woman.

“I love you.” His voice seemed to echo through the space and broke the spell over their audience.

“I love you too.” They walked out, hand in hand.

The reactions of people that would be their near constant audience wouldn’t always be so positive. She knew that but they would not let that stand in their way. They couldn’t let that stand in the way. Somehow, she had to silence that voice in the back of her head telling her she wasn’t enough, there would be enough voices already saying. Of that much she could be sure.

The only voice that could matter was his. That was the only voice she would let matter. Until the day ever came that he said those horrible things her own mind told her, until the day came that he said she wasn’t enough any longer she would stay by his side.

 

Tom had a car waiting for them and somehow it was a relaxed ride to his choice of hotel. It was nice, much nicer than anything she had stayed in before. In the end, having a car bring them back to Grant may have been cheaper yet. Sofya chewed on her lip as he booked them a room. Even as they entered, Tom reminded her if at any point she felt uncomfortable he could and would sleep on the couch. Everything seemed as a whirlwind to her, happening so fast and yet nothing about it felt wrong.

She would love him. She would let him love her. In the end, that would either be enough or it wouldn’t be. They would never know if they didn’t try and it took two to give it a try. It was decided then in her heart that she would give it her all.

For once in her life, she put her doubts aside. She told that voice in her head that always called her average and painfully plain to be silent. After kicking off her shoes she walked up to where he sat on the bed, pulling his shoes off. He looked up at her from where he sat when she stepped between his long legs. She could drown in the sea that was the blue of his eyes.

“Sofya?”

“I love you.” She answered with a searing kiss.

Tom wasted no time in returning the kiss. A heavy arm wrapped tightly around her back, pulling her to him as his other hand found its way into her hair. Breathing him in, she wrapped an arm around his neck and rested her other hand against his jaw. The feeling of his beard against her was urging her on.

When her knees went weak, Tom pulled her into his lap. A gasp escaped her when he softly took her lip between his. It was all the opening he needed to deepen the kiss. As his tongue found its way into her mouth, she had no choice but to cling to him. All she could think about was the feel of his breath on her face, the scratch of his beard against her skin and the lingering hint of whiskey she could taste on his tongue.

Her fingers found the long curls at the back of his neck. When she ran her fingers through the mass he groaned into the kiss, somehow holding her tighter yet to him. Under her hands, his muscles bunched, twitched and moved. The feeling of him against her was magical and addicting. Never had she felt like this before. The bed was soft on her back, though she couldn’t pinpoint when he moved her off his lap.

All the while, his lips hardly left her skin. The contrast between the softness of his kiss ant the rough of his neatly trimmed beard as he kissed along her jaw and down her neck. Both their breaths came in pants and gasps as Tom pulled away, hovering above her and supporting his weight with one hand and a knee both braced on the bed.

“Sofya, just tell me if you want me to stop.” He spoke as he nuzzled into her neck. “I don’t want to rush you. I don’t want you to think you have to.”

“Shut up, Tom.”

She leaned up and nibbled at his neck, leaving a trail of kisses as she tempted him back into action. With a hand running over his strong shoulders she pushed off his jacket. It took him no time to toss it aside. Strong hands found their way under the hem of her shirt, working their way painfully slowly up her ribs, giving her every chance to stop him.

Nimble fingers worked his tie free, sending it to rest somewhere in the room before setting about to work on the buttons of his shirt after pulling it free from his pants. It was true she had to share him with the world but right now, he was all hers.

 

Whatever would come, whatever the world would say she would do her best to not let it get to him. Somehow, painfully plain was exactly what he wanted, exactly what he needed. Somehow, he saw her as so much more. Maybe she could learn to see herself as he did.

If she ignored the voices, ignored what the world had to say it would be enough. Time would only tell. What she did know was that no matter what, she would always treat him the same. He would always be just a man to her, regardless of who was watching.

Let the world see. Let the world talk. It would be okay. She would just do her best to remain clueless.


End file.
